Yeah, I don't know about all of this.
Emotion makes everything better, that's for sure, but I'm not one to hold off sex or masturbation just because I'm not in love with anyone currently. I care about a lot of people. I care about some more than others. There's a cross-section selection of people I care more and less about with whom I have safe, but casual, sex. Maybe it doesn't reach the heights of passion as it might with someone I'm in love with, but that doesn't mean it's not intimate, passionate, and fulfilling. In fact, there are some people I've gone to for scenes where it's been so much more intimate with a Dom than it was with a vanilla guy I was in love with. Not because there was something wrong with the emotion, but because of the nature of BDSM.
For me, porn viewing and the subsequent arousal or masturbation is something like that. Sure, maybe it'd be "better" by some (but not all, as I'll get into in a second) measure if I were having sex with someone else. On the other hand, it could be much worse. And I don't mean any random person - you can genuinely like or love a person and they could be terrible in bed. I don't have a problem with being alone for most of my time, and I guess I therefore have no issue whatsoever about being intimate with my own damn self through porn or erotica. In fact, I rather like taking care of myself. I like myself, after all. Who else is going to take care of me if I don't?
The problem many religious people seem to have with porn is that they treat it like a "distraction" from whatever it is they deem is more important. Family. Husband/wife. Work. Whatever. It's like there's this attitude that there's something wrong with you if you spend some time to yourself, with yourself and your private thoughts, which don't hurt ANYONE I might add. Unless, of course, you believe in a voyeuristic god who punishes thought-crimes. Spending a little time on yourself isn't selfish. It's healthy. If you boost your endorphins and mood with some masturbation or fulfill a fantasy with fantasy material, who the fuck cares? Only busy-bodies who are somehow threatened in self-esteem or religiously by the act, and even then only emotionally.
If porn doesn't interest you, then fine. Just as long as no one is crusading for other people not to watch it because they think that monogamous, real-life sex is "better." It's the sex THEY prefer, only. Not necessarily 'better'. If the porn is made by consenting adults, then all's well that ends with an orgasm.
It's just your unfortunate lot that Christians are far more prevalent and far more loud about their individual distastes than other religions. I promise you that conservative and orthodox jews can be just as shitty about it. They're merely less shitty (on the conservative end) about sex in general between a husband and wife. There are rabbinical laws about how often a wife is supposed to be "serviced" by her husband based on the job he has.
Emotion makes everything better, that's for sure, but I'm not one to hold off sex or masturbation just because I'm not in love with anyone currently. I care about a lot of people. I care about some more than others. There's a cross-section selection of people I care more and less about with whom I have safe, but casual, sex. Maybe it doesn't reach the heights of passion as it might with someone I'm in love with, but that doesn't mean it's not intimate, passionate, and fulfilling. In fact, there are some people I've gone to for scenes where it's been so much more intimate with a Dom than it was with a vanilla guy I was in love with. Not because there was something wrong with the emotion, but because of the nature of BDSM.
For me, porn viewing and the subsequent arousal or masturbation is something like that. Sure, maybe it'd be "better" by some (but not all, as I'll get into in a second) measure if I were having sex with someone else. On the other hand, it could be much worse. And I don't mean any random person - you can genuinely like or love a person and they could be terrible in bed. I don't have a problem with being alone for most of my time, and I guess I therefore have no issue whatsoever about being intimate with my own damn self through porn or erotica. In fact, I rather like taking care of myself. I like myself, after all. Who else is going to take care of me if I don't?
The problem many religious people seem to have with porn is that they treat it like a "distraction" from whatever it is they deem is more important. Family. Husband/wife. Work. Whatever. It's like there's this attitude that there's something wrong with you if you spend some time to yourself, with yourself and your private thoughts, which don't hurt ANYONE I might add. Unless, of course, you believe in a voyeuristic god who punishes thought-crimes. Spending a little time on yourself isn't selfish. It's healthy. If you boost your endorphins and mood with some masturbation or fulfill a fantasy with fantasy material, who the fuck cares? Only busy-bodies who are somehow threatened in self-esteem or religiously by the act, and even then only emotionally.
If porn doesn't interest you, then fine. Just as long as no one is crusading for other people not to watch it because they think that monogamous, real-life sex is "better." It's the sex THEY prefer, only. Not necessarily 'better'. If the porn is made by consenting adults, then all's well that ends with an orgasm.
It's just your unfortunate lot that Christians are far more prevalent and far more loud about their individual distastes than other religions. I promise you that conservative and orthodox jews can be just as shitty about it. They're merely less shitty (on the conservative end) about sex in general between a husband and wife. There are rabbinical laws about how often a wife is supposed to be "serviced" by her husband based on the job he has.
![[Image: Untitled2_zpswaosccbr.png]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=i1140.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fn569%2Fthesummerqueen%2FUntitled2_zpswaosccbr.png)
