Christian marriage in 2015

[drfuzzy]

Biblically speaking, there is no such thing as “marital rape” – HOWEVER, there is such a thing as physical abuse. While the Bible does not speak specifically to this case of a man forcing himself on his wife, I believe it is a case of physical abuse.

So what others call rape, I call abuse. In the same way that when someone is wrongfully killed it might be first degree murder, second degree murder or man slaughter what we call “physical abuse” and what we call “rape” is dependent on the relationship between the man and woman in question. There is no doubt a wrong has been committed. But what we call it, and how it is punished or dealt with is very different depending on the circumstances.

My head is spinning just trying to wrap it around that.  So, he's saying it's wrong, but it's not rape?  And if it's physical abuse, what else do you call physical abuse of the genitals but rape?

I didn't find the author of the "Biblically speaking" quote.  But I can tell you that the author is male, and has never been raped.  I am also a survivor of domestic violence.  (Is wife-beating ever addressed in the Bible?  I don't think so.  I should look it up.)  I can tell you clearly that many women survive the constant dull fear of wondering when the next punch and slap will come.  But having to live with your rapist . . .                   [fighting back nausea] 
suicide would start to look really, really, really awesomely good in a very short time.