Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: August 7, 2025, 3:17 am

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
The Oncological Argument against the existence of God
#42
RE: The Oncological Argument against the existence of God
Aractus: There are ways of telling whether he is god.

Roby Pants: Are there? Oh well, tell us.

Aractus: Tell me. What do you do with gods?

Roby Pants: Pray to them.

Aractus: And what do you pray to, apart from gods?

Roby Pants: tutles.

Stimbo: Wood.

Aractus: Good. Now, why do Gods want to be prayed to?

Vorlon: ...because they're made of... wood?

Aractus: Good. So how do you tell whether he is made of wood?

Roby Pants: Build a bridge out of him.

Aractus: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?

Roby Pants: Oh yeah.

Aractus: Does wood sink in water?

Roby Pants: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw him into the pond!

Aractus: No, no. What else floats in water?

Roby Pants: Bread.

Stimbo: Apples.

Vorlon: Very small rocks.

Roby Pants: Cider.

Stimbo: Gravy.

Vorlon: Cherries.

Roby Pants: Mud.

Stimbo: Churches.

Vorlon: Lead! Lead!

Losty: A Duck.

Aractus: ...Exactly. So, logically...

Roby Pants: If he weighed the same as a duck... he's made of wood.

Aractus: And therefore...

Stimbo: ... GOD !!
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




Reply



Messages In This Thread
RE: The Oncological Argument against the existence of God - by vorlon13 - December 25, 2015 at 1:03 am

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Can God be objectively good despite criticism against Him/Her/It? Ahriman 80 13332 May 29, 2022 at 11:38 am
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  Are miracles evidence of the existence of God? ido 74 9667 July 24, 2020 at 12:59 pm
Last Post: The Grand Nudger
  10 Syllogistic arguments for Gods existence Otangelo 84 17134 January 14, 2020 at 5:59 pm
Last Post: Abaddon_ire
  How to destroy any argument for God Drich 46 8314 October 9, 2019 at 9:02 am
Last Post: Mister Agenda
  How To Support Any Argument For God BrianSoddingBoru4 0 670 August 26, 2019 at 4:52 pm
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  How To Easily Defend Any Argument For God BrianSoddingBoru4 5 1249 August 22, 2019 at 9:13 pm
Last Post: The Valkyrie
  Quantum Physics Proves God’s Existence blue grey brain 15 3028 January 2, 2019 at 11:08 pm
Last Post: The Grand Nudger
  Why are you chasing the idea of the existence of a God? WinterHold 26 5085 August 7, 2018 at 2:05 pm
Last Post: The Grand Nudger
  11-Year-Old College Grad Wants to Pursue Astrophysics to Prove God’s Existence Silver 49 10550 August 2, 2018 at 4:51 pm
Last Post: Pat Mustard
  Very short argument for God (another clear proof) Mystic 123 32384 January 26, 2018 at 8:54 pm
Last Post: Succubus



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)