Maureen Dowd Gets to the heart of the Pervert Priest Scandal

[Violet]

If you actually want to die: make darn sure you're going to succeed. If you don't want to die: don't try. Death is final, a half-measured approach is only going to hurt a lot.

I guess what I'm saying is that it's rare to feel (when you're depressed) like you 100% want to die, or that you 100% don't want to die. Usually it's somewhere in between, and you're struggling with both options. And of course you're not thinking all that rationally, so you're conflicted and confused. That's my experience anyway.

[/quote]

I do not disagree that suicidal people are in serious emotional agony.

I'm mildly cheerful that you failed though

Well thanks So am I, life definitely got better

Alas, there is no fast-forward button to life.

I always will view failure poorly (especially that of myself). I am not judging people who fail to commit suicide because they are depressed/suicidal... i am judging them because they failed... and failed something so easily accomplished as death.

I judge myself harshly for failure as well. And there is definitely that shame when you fail to kill yourself, like 'why can't I just do ONE goddamn thing right, for once.' I agree that death is easily accomplished, but I just don't think it's an easy decision to make, it's a pretty agonizing one. Like, 'What will happen if I'm rescued? What about the pain I'll be causing my loved ones? What if things would've got better if I'd just waited? What if there's a God and I'm going to hell?' (well, I wouldn't be thinking THAT one anymore, at least )

Committing suicide doesn't necessarily mean you want to die... certain objectives can only be accomplished by death (protecting information that might otherwise be learned, use of body as a shield for someone/something else).

Death is only a difficult decision if you happen to value something else about as much as dying. I feel like both pizza and spaghetti, and both are available.... that is a difficult decision. Feel like pizza and not spaghetti? Easy choice. Feel like spaghetti and not pizza? Easy choice. Death is currently an easy choice for me (that being not to inflict it upon myself needlessly).

I've yet use for this bag of flesh, too soon to let it go