gay or atheist?

[Jenny A]

My mother has been distressed that I'm an atheist for going on 40 years now. But we still have a pretty good relationship, though she is now also distressed that her granddaughters are atheist. My husband hasn't had the atheism discussion with his family.

The real problem for us is that we have a lesbian daughter newly out to a very limited number of people. She wants to wait to be out generally when she starts college a year from now. Do I really have to say we love her and are supportive? I haven't outed her to Mom. When, if ever, to do that is her choice, but it may be bad for awhile. My brother's daughter is also lesbian. Mom doesn't know that either. She's older and I keep hoping she will tell Mom first.

We are pretty sure my husband's sister's daughter is also lesbian. As they are homophobic evangelical, we are a worried about that. But we aren't worried about her grandfather, he will be accepting. Fortunately her grandfather lives very close. We hope that will help. We will offer a home if comes to that. But we are on the other side of the country, and hardly ideal.

In the long run, I think my mother and my husband's family will find a way to accept. But the interim may not be pretty.

That said atheism will/would bother them all more long term.