[split] The Newly Departed thread: announcements (departures)

[Joods]

I give up. I was feeling better after Shell was nice to reassure me but now I feel like my thank you wasn't accepted. Appreciating reassurance when given =/= excessively seeking reassurance. I feel so alone and misunderstood.

See, but now you're making me feel bad because I did accept your thank you and then just continued having a conversation. You're putting the onus of your emotions on me, which isn't fair from a friend. (I know you're going to debate this, but there is no other way to take it. You talk about how I didn't take your post the right way and no you feel so alone and misunderstood. Seriously?) I never said that you accepting it when given is the same as excessively seeking it. I said it looks like you're excessively seeking it from my perspective. Coming here and talking about your feelings and only accepting responses that are reassuring/arguing with those that aren't reassuring looks suspiciously like reassurance seeking. You act like admitting you might do something that is human to do is wrong. You make it seem like I'm saying excessive reassurance seeking makes you a bad person. I'm just saying that for someone who claims he knows all the right things to do, you're feeling awful an awful lot. Friends spot that stuff and try to help by giving advice. If you don't want help, you've chosen the wrong friends, clearly.

I'm starting to think that a lot of people are full of shit.

Sorry I disagreed with you and responded to your posts about your feelings. I'm not full of shit. I'm actually quite sorry I tried to be helpful in the only ways I know how, by offering advice.

This. Spot on Shell.

And it relates to what I was saying elsewhere. Essentially, no one can say anything unless its good. Constructive criticism gets taken the wrong way and then we're left with all this over analyzing of things and (for lack of a better way of saying it), we are made responsible for the feelings of others. No. We aren't. I can't make anyone else feel a certain way. If my words want to be taken out of context, That's on the reader. I shouldn't have to spend pages explaining or apologizing for what I said when its clear from the get go, what was meant.

I am only responsible for what I say, not what others choose to understand.