Morality from the ground up

[Astonished]

That's known as rational self interest.  Isn't that exactly what you asked for?  "Nobody hurt me" becomes "nobody should hurt others"..because, rationally, we recognize that we are the others to everyone else.

I'd say this represents the norm.  However, a significant number of people fall outside the norm.  My own case, which I won't bother to bring up explicitly, shows that there can be disconnects in places that are surprising to both parties.

Here's an example.  I don't want to be hurt, and I can see that animals are capable of being hurt, so I choose to avoid where I can anything that is likely to cause animal suffering.  But people are omnivores, and relatively few hold that seem feeling.  This is non-trivial, because it applies to people, too.  I see all people as deserving respect.  However, there are MANY people, in all  parts of the world, who see their own as important, and strangers as nearly irrelevant.

Is there a way to mediate this rationally, or must it done by the democracy of action-- whichever group can generate more action will take control of that part of the set of moral memes?

I hate the vegetarian/vegan moral argument. From what I learned in one of my bio/anthro classes, if our evolutionary ancestors weren't eating the flesh (and brains) of other animals, it doesn't seem like our brains would have enlarged and developed to the point they are at now. We owe the ability to even contemplate these matters rationally on carnivorous diets. I do agree unnecessary harm should be avoided (furs, animal testing that isn't medical) since tormenting them is a sign of psychopathy that can spread to how one treats other humans, but food and essential materials (I think they make glue from horse hooves, or they used to or something) or even donor organs from compatible animals, are easily permissible.