Divorce questions/thoughts

[AFTT47]

Why get divorced?  Honestly it sounds like you get along with your wife in everyway but sexually. She's given you permission to meet your sexual needs elsewhere, presumably while staying married.

Why not just do That! Newsflash, you don't need to have all your needs met by one person. Tell your wife you want to have a consensual affair, which she said was okay, stay married and go meet the new (Or rather old) fling. It seems to be what everyone wants.

I agree with this totally. Just because the "norm" is that married couples relate in a certain way doesn't mean it needs to be that way. Your wife is a good, compatible partner who just isn't into sex and is okay with you getting that elsewhere. The biggest hickup I see is that your old flame will not be okay with the arrangement. It's always possible that your wife won't really be okay with it either but I'm inclined to believe her. If it was a case of you just sucking in bed, she would have been the one filing for divorce long ago. She hasn't because it's a non-issue for her. She's asexual.

There's nothing wrong with non-standard relationships between consenting adults.

Honestly, I find the whole concept of "cheating" to be a bit immature. Regardless of arrangement, you never have ownership of another human being. I think it's a bit unrealistic in most cases because of human nature. In this particular case when the woman is apparently asexual and has given verbal consent, this shouldn't even be an issue.

Legally, it's another matter. The legal system in the United States is incredibly archaic. Judges are addressed as, "your honor", court buildings are built with pillars for support to honor ancient traditions and the whole thing is offensively pompous. It is not an arena where progressive ideas are well received. In order to legally protect yourself, well - you might want to get legal counsel first.

Still, talk to your wife and see if you can preserve a good thing in such a way you are both happy. If not, then go for the divorce. Neither of you should be a slave to convention though. Who the hell is society to create these artificial boxes such as friend, lover, spouse, etc. and insist that any relationship conform to one of those boxes? Consenting adults should feel free to make their own boxes.