Before We Discuss Whether God Exists, I Have A Question

[Cecelia]

The existence of suffering is probably the most difficult thing to reconcile with the Christian God. Especially when it ends up being you that a horrible thing happens to.

Back when I was still a Christian, I could not be convinced of an interfering God simply for the reason of suffering.  Every time I read about a child being abducted, molested, and murdered (of which there are a LOT) I just can't see how any God could sit back and let that happen.  When a man can abduct and rape a 9 year old girl, then stuff her in a trash bag and bury her, letting her suffocate to death... I just can't see how an interfering God would just let that happen.  Doesn't matter if the girl was an atheist, a muslim, a jew, black, white.  Doesn't matter who the attacker was either.  An all knowing, all seeing, all loving god who interferes couldn't just sit back and let that happen.  If I were god, those men would be struck by lightning before they got their victim back to their house.  On a clear blue day, without a cloud in the sky.  Or heck, barring that I'd lead a Bear to maul him to death.  I mean he supposedly did it to these guys who were making fun of a prophet. 

Once I accepted that though, I had a hard time reconciling God with the God of the Old Testament.  I mean he was obviously an interfering God in the Old Testament.  He freed the people of Israel from the Egyptians.  (At least according to the bible). 

From there it's not hard to question the existence of the Christian God.   Did this God interfere, and then stopped?  Or did the people of the past just think he interfered, when God wasn't involved at all.  At which point I had to ask myself "If God wasn't involved in the Old Testament, then who's to say the old testament is accurate at all?  None of the stories make sense.  Some of the stories even make God sound like a horrible individual."  I know a lot of Christians who say that you're SUPPOSED to Fear God.  Which I find hard to reconcile with the idea of a benevolent god.  I mean is such a god (One that is of Fear) worthy of worship?  Do I want to worship someone like that?   But I find it very in line with the old testament.

I think for an honest conversation about all of this, people have to be able to at least consider the possibility that God doesn't exist.  Because if you start with the assumption god exists, and can only work within those parameters, you'll quickly find excuses.  From the less harmful but totally useless "God would have to save EVERYONE if he saved one person." and "She's in heaven now!"   to the despicable "Well if she prayed harder and just believed he would have saved her!"  It immediately closes the possibility that there is no god, and that's why these children aren't saved.  Whether it's the abduction victim, one of the kids at Sandy Hook, or any of the kids that were in the Alfred P Murrah building.