Before We Discuss Whether God Exists, I Have A Question

[Jenny A]

You are correct in saying that I want to have a true belief.  That is the crux of it.  Regardless of whether it is possible to know for certain, I still want my belief to be correct.  Not everyone does.  Which is why it is so hard to get Christians to say, "If god does not exist, I don't want to believe in him." It is my way of determing if you all really want to know.  If you don't, then you can't discuss the evidence honestly.  

Some people don't want to know if they have cancer AIDS.  Some people don't want to know if a loved one suffered in death, or if their spouse cheated on them.  

This isn't the only question that people sometimes don't want the answer to.  Just recently we offered a 23 and Me kit to Mr. A's dad.  He declined the offer because his nephew had taken the test and came back only 1/4  English.  Mr. A Senior's parents were both English so he expected his nephew to be around 1/2 English.  This leads Mr. A Senior to suspect, rightly or wrongly, that his mother had an affair.  He would rather not have proof one way or the other.  So he will not take the test and has asked Mr. A not to tell him his results.  He would prefer, as his says, not to know if his mother had had an affair.  It would disturb his memory of her.  I'm not going to discuss it with him.

Like theists who will not say that they want to believe there is no god, if there isn't one, they prefer believing one thing, without examining the other possibility.  And that's fine, as long as the don't want to discuss the possibilities with me.

But you are forgetting a major point. The Christian you are talking to already believes there to be a certain amount of evidence for their belief. You are not asking them to consider a new body of evidence they have yet to form an opinion on and seek a truth value. They have already committed to Christianity for some list of reasons. So when you want them to consider that God may not exist, you are asking them to reject things they already hold to be true. In other words, the question you are asking them is identical to "if what I already have reasons to believe is true turns out to be wrong, I don't want to believe it." That is not as straightforward as you make it out to be. 

I also think the subject does not lend itself to your little test. It would be fine for say politics or scientific theories where the stakes are lower. Also, you are not just talking about a position on a single question: does God exists? You have taken the person's entire worldview and ask them to reject it on the basis of a debate with you. That is not going to happen. So if they agree to your terms, I would suspect they don't understand your point or are not serious.

No, the fact that the Christian has his entire worldview wrapped up in the question of God's existence is precisely why I don't want to discuss the question with them. They are not really prepared to look at it objectively because being Christian is part of their self definition.. The question is designed to make that clear. AND END THE CONVERSATION BEFORE IT BEGINS. -Sorry to shout but if you read my OP you will see that the purpose is to avoid trying to deconvert my relatives without simply giving up.

Personally, the more important a question is, the more I want to get the underlying facts right. Whether to embark on a whole world view changing belief is a very important question. Whether the underlying facts are correct is of the up most importance. Therefore I really do want to look at the evidence objectively. You may not, but I do.

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It does assume that there is or isn't god.  I'd be interested to know if you think there is a third possibility?  Doubt about which answer is correct is certainly possible. The question is do you want to make your choice the answer that is most likely to be true  even if that turns out to that there is no god.  

If not, and you are a relative of mine likely to be distressed by the conversation, and believe me, conversations between close relatives about a God some of them believe in and some of them don't can be distressing, then I don't want to have the conversation with you.

I continue to be amused at the number of Christians who are not my relatives, who both want to play, but are unwilling to say that little sentence.

I try to live by what I believe to be good and true. I acknowledge that I could be wrong and even open to the possibility that I am. It is the same openness that prompted me question my prior atheism and follow reason and experience to what I now believe more likely to be true

That may be why you are here.    it is not why Myrtal wants to talk to me about god.