Peterson's 12 Rules For Life, have you heard of this?

[The Valkyrie]

1. Smile in the face of adversity but always have a backup plan.
2. Never lose your cool when faced with obnoxious people. You can always come back when there are no witnesses or innocent bystanders around.
3. There's no such thing as an innocent bystander. Everyone is guilty of something.
4. Every cloud has a silver lining. If, for instance, a city is destroyed, its whole criminal community got the death penalty.
5. Every silver lining has a cloud.
6. It takes only slightly more energy to stab someone through the ribs than it does to smile and turn the other cheek.
7. Turning the other cheek gets that one slapped, too.
8. A sucking chest wound is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
9. Remember, if you go into combat that your equipment was provided by the lowest bidder.
10. If your ship sinks and you have to get into a lifeboat, get into the one with the fat person.
11. Cannibalism is only a rude word if your survival doesn't depend on it.