IF you deconverted in midlife, can you help?

[Dragonfly]

I deconverted 6 years ago, though I haven't gone cold-turkey on church.  I am an atheist Unitarian Universalist.  That simply means that I find the community of church, and the quest for ultimate meaning to be valuable, despite not believing in any gods or afterlife.

To "fill the holes", my current philosophy is that each moment of each life has value.  To whom, I'm not sure -- to just that person?  To the universe itself?  I don't know.  I just think that if each moment does not have value, then by extension, nothing has value.I want to check out the Unitarian Universalist congregation again. One of the turnoffs in the past was it seemed to be too heavy on

In Christianity, we are taught that an infinite afterlife is far more valuable than anything on Earth.  That is a terrible lie, because not only is there no afterlife, but it is a terrible thing to devalue each moment of life.  In each moment, whether it be painful or joyous, I am a witness to the wonder and mystery of life, and the unfolding of the universe.  When a family member dies, I am a witness to the value of their life, and how their life interconnects with mine and others.  In the future, when no-one remembers us, we will still have existed, and are a part of the fixed history of humanity.

I do not fear the billions of years that I did not exist before I was born.  I don't fear the trillions that will exist after I die.  For me, there is only each moment, as a witness to all the at is good and bad.  If I cannot value this moment, then no moments have value, whether I live 70 years or an infinite number.

I think everyone has to build their own story of meaning.  Mine is constantly evolving.  Mankind has created countless religions to quell their fears.  Forget the myths of the past, and come up with your own story that meshes with what you truly believe.  Good luck!

I want to check out the Unitarian Universalist congregation again. One of the turnoffs in the past was it seemed to be too heavy on politics. 

"In Christianity, we are taught that an infinite afterlife is far more valuable than anything on Earth.  That is a terrible lie, because not only is there no afterlife, but it is a terrible thing to devalue each moment of life."

Yes, it really does devalue life. It also harms the environment as it's a belief that the earth will be destroyed by fire anyway, so many Christians wonder why they should bother caring. 

"In each moment, whether it be painful or joyous, I am a witness to the wonder and mystery of life, and the unfolding of the universe."

But how do you make that personal? I don't know if personal is the right word, but that's what I'm trying to replace. 

"When a family member dies, I am a witness to the value of their life, and how their life interconnects with mine and others.  In the future, when no-one remembers us, we will still have existed, and are a part of the fixed history of humanity."


I wish I could approach death with this attitude. I'm not sure what it would take. 

"I do not fear the billions of years that I did not exist before I was born.  I don't fear the trillions that will exist after I die.  For me, there is only each moment, as a witness to all the at is good and bad.  If I cannot value this moment, then no moments have value, whether I live 70 years or an infinite number."

Maybe mindfulness meditation would be helpful. I want this kind of peace.