Deconversion and some doubts

[Belacqua]

I'm in my early twenties, I want to have the best time of my life, party, have sex and stuff But there is still this voice in the back of my head, and though I'm trying to do these things, they are accompanied by worries and guilt.

Judging just by your OP, you sound like a good person!

I don't see any reason why you have to hurry up and settle all the issues about morality while you're still so young. Yes, for sure, enjoy yourself. But I think it's great that you're deeply concerned about the morality of what you're doing. You're working with the morality you were raised with, and it may not be the best, but it's also a good thing to have a conscience. Especially while you're young and have the potential to really mess things up.

Anomie is a real thing, and we can see it all around. I'm NOT saying that religion is the only alternative, but an inner voice that keeps you from doing your worst is a valuable thing. A more mature morality will be built through life experiences. 

But I repeat: it is OK to enjoy yourself!