[Serious] Are you in therapy?

[arewethereyet]

Yes. This is something I try to remember.

But amidst the frustration of the occasional time doctrine comes up, it's hard to remember that when they stand in as a representative for those falsehoods. And I've had it occur to me mid-discussion before that the person I'm talking to has been lied to just like I was, but I double down on frustration because I wish I could save them, snap them out of it. It's not about saving them though, it's about me. Because I think I was so so dumb to have fallen for it, to have been in it so much for so long. And that's what I think I need guidance processing. I think it's called projection. I can name it, identify it when it has occurred, but I don't know how to stop doing it.

There's a difference between dumb and indoctrinated, even the intelligent can be brainwashed. Try therapy but also cut yourself some slack.

What Brewer said is very true. A former coworker (and still friend) was raised JW. She broke from it shortly before I met her and they really put her through some crap. She even lost her daughter to her ex for several years and was disfellowed in the church in front of her daughter.

We were talking one day about what she would do if she ever had to make the decision for her daughter to have a blood transfusion to save her life. Though it had been a few years, she was still hesitant to answer and said she hoped she didn't ever have to make that decision. I reminded her that it was a blood transfusion that saved her younger brother's life (their dad was not JW and he approved it). Her response was that her brother probably wouldn't have Hep C had he not had that transfusion...yeah, but he'd be dead.

It was during that conversation I realized how deeply the hooks were into her.

Another heartbreaking convo with her was when she said she was sort of glad her grandmother was suffering from dementia because if her grandmother remembered that she had been disfellowed, she would not be welcome to visit.

Counseling, with the right therapist, did her a world of good.