Indoctrination

[Spongebob]

Yeah this is just disingenuous. No amount of proof would be good enough for you. You fancy being an atheist too much.

If someone can show me something that happens which cannot possibly be explained in any other way than "gods did it" that would probably be proof enough. Not happened yet though

The bold text here is certainly a possibility for almost anyone.  If you are so invested in a given worldview that you refuse to accept new information, then you are being tenacious about it, meaning rejecting new information because it appears to conflict with your accepted reality.  This is where being a strong skeptic comes in handy.  It's good to question things, especially things you really like or really believe in.  Its good to practice this concept so you don't lose perspective.  So long as you do that, you won't be disingenuous.  But in the case of the god question, its just such a huge question to contemplate.  I would honestly say that my views on supernatural beings have changed more times than I can count.  I've no full reversals, but there have certainly been numerous alternate paths.  I couldn't return to a conventional Christian worldview any more than I could accept the idea that Thor creates thunder when he's made at us.