I'm only pulling your collective legs. I fully understand that there are cultural and linguistic differences between our two great nations and though there are always going to be new things for each to learn about the other - enter into evidence the Marmite thread - I'm cognisant of the biscuit thing. We should all take pride in what makes our native country great and also embrace the differences; so let's just agree that Americans are weird and go from there.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'