Stupid things religious people say

[Fake Messiah]

"Oh no! I can no longer lie into a casket like a corpse and be carried around the streets because the local priest calls it witchcraft. But I know what I'll do! I'll start a petition! That'll show him! And if that doesn't work, I'll crawl around the streets on my knees leaving behind a bloody trail to honor the promise I gave to the statues of saints in the local church."

Priest Calls Coffin Procession ‘Witchcraft’ and Demands It Be Stopped

Every year in late July, my grandfather would tell me about the people who lay in coffins, not for burial but for blessing. He described how, in parts of Galicia, people would ride inside open caskets carried by friends and family through the streets. The ritual was a sacred and public act of gratitude for life spared and death deferred.

Now, decades later, the same ritual—known as the Romería de los ataúdes—has drawn national attention, not for its significance, but because a local priest wants it banned as witchcraft.

Father Francisco Javier de Ramiro Crespo, newly assigned to Ribarteme, declared that for as long as he was a priest, “there will be no more coffin processions.” Taking advantage of pandemic restrictions, he stopped the centuries-old practice. “I am dedicated to evangelizing,” he said, “not to promoting superstitions, folklore, or witchcraft.” Outraged villagers fought back. One, Jorge Rodríguez, had been denied his promise to participate in the previous year’s festival. He organized a petition and collected 500 signatures, eventually brokering a compromise with the diocese: the coffins could appear outside the church, but not during the Mass itself. The town’s mayor, José Manuel Alfonso, did not mince words: “He [the priest] is not in the habit of attending to anyone. I’m not going to convince him or get involved. What concerns me is that there is normality.”

Despite the concession, the tension only grew. Last week, in 2025, the friction reached a new high. After Mass on Santa Marta’s feast day, a middle-aged man, having survived a life-threatening incident, kept his promise. Though denied permission to ride inside a coffin, he crawled the route on bloody knees while his family carried the coffin above him.

The priest, unmoved, claimed ignorance of the event and refused to comment. “It’s a joke and a lack of respect toward a centuries-old tradition,” said one woman who was quoted in La Voz de Galicia newspaper, watching with tears in her eyes as the man limped onward, candle in hand. “Seeing one of our own keep his promise to the saint is deeply moving.”

The Diocese of Tui-Vigo later issued a circular stating that parish priests may release individuals from vows made to saints, basically only deepening the rift. While once a dozen coffins might have been seen in the procession, recent years have seen only one or two. Participation is dwindling. “Not bringing out the coffins drives people away,” said one local. Another added, “The tradition may soon slip into memory.”

https://wildhunt.org/2025/08/priest-call...opped.html