Gay Marriage: Why the christians need to STFU about it
May 17, 2012 at 8:02 pm
(This post was last modified: May 17, 2012 at 8:05 pm by Creed of Heresy.)
Most Christians use whole tracts of the Old Testament to qualify their arguments about why gay marriage is immoral, mostly from the book of Leviticus. The problem is that when Jesus came around he formed something called the "New Covenant," which means that all that stuff about sacrificing goats and shit no longer apply. So, when you follow Old Testament laws, you're not being a good Christian, you're being a dirty, ultra-orthodox Jew.
If you followed Leviticus to a T, you're also expected to:
1: Not wear fabrics made with blended fibers (so no underwear with elastic waists)
2: Not shave your beard (I don't see a lot of Christians walking around with unshaven beards)
3: Two types of seed may not be planted in the same field. Too bad crop rotation is an essential part of modern farming.
4: Shellfish are right out too. Goodbye, lobster dinner.
5: No crossbreeding anything. Goodbye mules, as well as practically any seedless fruit.
6: Tattoos are not allowed.
7: Ditto is eating blood and fat. Goodbye rare steaks. Or, hell, any kind of burger or steak that isn't ridiculously, meticulously cut.
8: You can't has cheeseburger, either, because Leviticus also forbids mixing meat and dairy.
The New Testament argument against homosexuality is gleaned mostly from Paul's letter to the Corinthians. Paul's disclaimer at the beginning of this letter is that as long as you are a good Christian, the liturgy of laws he states from the Torah do not apply to you.
Jesus himself denied the ethical code laid down by Moses because they were written a couple thousand years before Jesus started his ministry and were thus totally out of date almost FOUR THOUSAND FUCKING YEARS AGO!
God might "hate fags" but Jesus doesn't mention homosexuality once in the Bible. If God was so pissed at the faggots then why the hell didn't he tell his son to tell his chosen people to keep their cocks away from each others bungholes?
When a Centurion asked Jesus to heal his gay lover, Jesus called him the most faithful man in Jerusalem...OK, well the term used for "gay lover" may be interpreted different ways, but-
We could dive into the actual language of the bible to prove him wrong, but this shit is already way waaaaay too fucking boring.
So, to all Christians, please, kindly, do us all a favor on the issue of gay marriage...and shut the fuck up. K? K. Your hypocrisy is difficult enough to deal with. You don't need to give me any more reasons to want to smack you in the face with a hot cast iron frying pan, much less a dozen or so of them all rolled into one.
If you followed Leviticus to a T, you're also expected to:
1: Not wear fabrics made with blended fibers (so no underwear with elastic waists)
2: Not shave your beard (I don't see a lot of Christians walking around with unshaven beards)
3: Two types of seed may not be planted in the same field. Too bad crop rotation is an essential part of modern farming.
4: Shellfish are right out too. Goodbye, lobster dinner.
5: No crossbreeding anything. Goodbye mules, as well as practically any seedless fruit.
6: Tattoos are not allowed.
7: Ditto is eating blood and fat. Goodbye rare steaks. Or, hell, any kind of burger or steak that isn't ridiculously, meticulously cut.
8: You can't has cheeseburger, either, because Leviticus also forbids mixing meat and dairy.
The New Testament argument against homosexuality is gleaned mostly from Paul's letter to the Corinthians. Paul's disclaimer at the beginning of this letter is that as long as you are a good Christian, the liturgy of laws he states from the Torah do not apply to you.
Jesus himself denied the ethical code laid down by Moses because they were written a couple thousand years before Jesus started his ministry and were thus totally out of date almost FOUR THOUSAND FUCKING YEARS AGO!
God might "hate fags" but Jesus doesn't mention homosexuality once in the Bible. If God was so pissed at the faggots then why the hell didn't he tell his son to tell his chosen people to keep their cocks away from each others bungholes?
When a Centurion asked Jesus to heal his gay lover, Jesus called him the most faithful man in Jerusalem...OK, well the term used for "gay lover" may be interpreted different ways, but-
We could dive into the actual language of the bible to prove him wrong, but this shit is already way waaaaay too fucking boring.
So, to all Christians, please, kindly, do us all a favor on the issue of gay marriage...and shut the fuck up. K? K. Your hypocrisy is difficult enough to deal with. You don't need to give me any more reasons to want to smack you in the face with a hot cast iron frying pan, much less a dozen or so of them all rolled into one.
