(July 3, 2012 at 2:29 am)Jugsmcgee Wrote: Hey there,
I'm a recently realized atheist, within the last two months, and today my father died suddenly at age 67. I have no desire to pray. My family decided to have a priest come In and read him his last rights, which brought some comfort to a couple of my family members. The priest was a nice man, with a genuine heart and concern for our family, which I really appreciated. I do feel grateful that I have found myself to be an atheist before this happened. I have, thus far, been able to accept my father's death in a much more tolerable way than if I had believed in god. If I believed, Imagine I would have a lot more anger and a lot more questions as to why a loving god would have taken my father so soon. At this moment, though still in shock, with a broken heart, I am a grateful and proud, yet devastated atheist.
Sorry about your loss. I lost my dad at 13.
Believers do not want to see life as it is. Death is an unfortunate, but quite mundane and natural part of all of biological evolution. All plants, insects, animals, and humans die.
But in your pain, remember, your anger isn't at any real god, but the claim of a god a person makes that their claimed diety is all good and all loving and all powerful. Epicurus addresses this broken concept in "The problem with evil".
I had a friend who was an atheist who served in WW2, was an atheist then and died almost 10 years ago. We knew he was dying. He knew he was dying. A bunch of Unitarians, of the church he attended, mixed beliefs, went to visit him. I took a huge risk in making a joke when we got there "Let us pray", Ben, they dying guy, and even the believers cracked up because of his atheism. It was nice to see him smile knowing what he was about to face.
So I know it never ultimately brings comfort, but you are better off facing reality than believing in utopias.
Just know that you had the time you had with him and he will survive in your brain as long as you are alive, and you can comfort yourself somewhat with the memories of the good times.
My mom has a phrase on a piece of paper on her desk, "Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened". You are going to cry, don't ignore that, but think about all the good as well.
Hope that helps somewhat.
