Sort of reminds me of the story of Alice and the Queen of Hearts - with a touch of 1984, "ignorance is bliss" thrown in.
I think the story works better if you reverse the roles. Make the Queen Christian and the intruders Atheist - unless you are aiming at high farce in which case you should probably have made the Queen, a cross-dressing King.
To be honest - bit too long, bit too boring - sorry. Most of the themes are worked to death and once we've got the role reversal of the fantasy (that its the theists that have the evidence and the atheists that are denying it) there are no surprises.
I don't get the relevance of the 9.95 gadget at the end. We already know, in the farce, that the Queen, courtiers et al are nuts. In Alice the Queen may ultimately meet her comeuppance but she really never understands how or why - the gadget providing wisdom (?) wouldn't work on them.
I think the story works better if you reverse the roles. Make the Queen Christian and the intruders Atheist - unless you are aiming at high farce in which case you should probably have made the Queen, a cross-dressing King.
To be honest - bit too long, bit too boring - sorry. Most of the themes are worked to death and once we've got the role reversal of the fantasy (that its the theists that have the evidence and the atheists that are denying it) there are no surprises.
I don't get the relevance of the 9.95 gadget at the end. We already know, in the farce, that the Queen, courtiers et al are nuts. In Alice the Queen may ultimately meet her comeuppance but she really never understands how or why - the gadget providing wisdom (?) wouldn't work on them.
