The vanilla bean-evolutionary quandry

[Brakeman]

Would you please, please, please change your fucking user name?!? You insult every professor in the world, even the one on Gilligan's Island, by calling yourself that.

The dictionary definition of the word, profess, includes -

Claim, often falsely, that one has (a quality or feeling):

Professor is falsely claiming that he knows what he's talking about so maybe it's a good user name for him after all.

Yes, but due to the common vernacular inference, he should be more specific. His name should be "Professor of stupidity." This would be much more honest to any newcomers.