(June 10, 2014 at 9:12 am)Jacob(smooth) Wrote: Atheism sucks big hairy balls. Sorry, but it does. Personal view only you understand.
Been a few months now and so far I got zero payoff. Squat. Diddly. I preferred my comfortable lie to this ugly truth, but having unplugged, I now can't plug myself back in or unthink what I thought.
I'm sorry to hear that you're having a rough time but, as others have said, did you really expect to get something when you became an atheist? Did you expect to win some kind of prize when you realized fairies and unicorns weren't real? No, why would a god be any different?
Quote:I can't even have fun debating with christians because I would not want them to lose what I lost!
I think I'm going through the kuber Ross model for Yahweh and I'm stuck on anger.
That's what this sounds like to me: a reactionary statement out of frustration and anger. You may feel differently about your loss of faith (and debating) in the future, but for now let things take their natural course, let yourself be angry for a time, and in the meantime find something that you enjoy doing and do it - a hobby, a sport, volunteering, a book club, etc.
Does it take more work to be an atheist? Arguably, yes: you have to seek out a social group if you want to be around like-minded people; you have to seek out volunteering opportunities on your own, they're not just passed around in the monthly newsletter; there's no reference manual for being an atheist, you have to find your own way.
It's hard and it can suck and it can feel daunting but I'd take atheism and being in charge of my own life every day if the alternative meant having to join a group I barely agree with whose leaders have questionable motives at best and are criminals at worst and that requires that I stop thinking for myself and just beeleeeeve what they tell me to.
Hang in there, Jacob, it'll (probably
) get better.
Teenaged X-Files obsession + Bermuda Triangle episode + Self-led school research project = Atheist.
