Anyone suffering from things they learned in the church?

[Mudhammam]

Around the age of 19-20, when I began seriously doubting that there was a God, I went through a severe depression. I couldn't fathom that life could have any meaning apart from my Christian faith, and although my depression subsided with the help of medication, a general sense of nihilism affected my peace of mind for a few years afterward. I do blame the Christian church for that.

Also, I blame the church that the first two decades of my life were largely squandered on memorizing scripture and worrying about stupid shit that has no application in the real world. I didn't discover the wealth of information that exists in the sciences and philosophy until I was free to conduct my own search for truth. So, I also blame the church for that, and I wonder, had I been free to discover secular writings at a younger age, perhaps I would have developed a passion for science in my younger years and who knows where I could've been now.

On the plus side, the church also partly gave me the perspective I have today, and since I'm very comfortable with myself these days, I am somewhat grateful for the wasted years of indoctrination, that is, the experiences which give me a keener sense of what we are up against.