so much pain

[MusicLovingAtheist]

Next time, MLA, don't ask if you can sit next to some one, just do it!

You aren't in high school. People are less clique-y in college. Don't ask, just sit down next to a person, and don't force a conversation. When you think about it too much, when you try too hard, that's when it gets awkward. Don't try to impress people, don't focus on whether they like you or not, just be you. I know that sounds like a bunch of platitudes. But seriously, college is a time when you find out who you are. The first year can be full of transformation and growth. You have to get yourself out of the dorm, go to some events on campus. Even ones you might not have any interest in. Go to some sports events, go to some voluntary lectures, go to some student concerts. Find out what things you like, and you will be socializing at the same time.

The key is finding some confidence in yourself. You have to find a way to become confident in who you are. What other people think of you, how they respond to you, all these things become less important when you have confidence.

My guess is this guy thought you were hitting on him, and he got awkward and bounced in a hurry.

I want to chop off my own head.