Horrible things in the bible

[Minimalist]

I've always wondered why the Romans didn't make it a point to prove that he didn't rise.

Because they never heard the story. The earliest Roman writer to comment on xtians ( if, in fact, he did not say "Chrestians") was Pliny the Younger.

They asserted, however, that the sum and substance of their fault or error had been that they were accustomed to meet on a fixed day before dawn and sing responsively a hymn to Christ as to a god, and to bind themselves by oath, not to some crime, but not to commit fraud, theft, or adultery, not falsify their trust, nor to refuse to return a trust when called upon to do so. When this was over, it was their custom to depart and to assemble again to partake of food--but ordinary and innocent food. Even this, they affirmed, they had ceased to do after my edict by which, in accordance with your instructions, I had forbidden political associations. Accordingly, I judged it all the more necessary to find out what the truth was by torturing two female slaves who were called deaconesses. But I discovered nothing else but depraved, excessive superstition.

http://www.earlychristianwritings.com/text/pliny.html

You will note that there is nothing in there about crucifixion or resurrection or ascending to fucking heaven. And the observation that they sung a hymn to Christ "as to a god" is most interesting.

Pliny the Younger was Governor of Bithynia-Pontus on the Black Sea in what is now Turkey. He was appointed in 110 AD and died in 112 AD so this correspondence can be securely dated.

Again, it is completely possible that Pliny was writing about Chrestus not Christos and some well-meaning monk in the middle ages decided to correct his spelling. Except the Chrestiani were real and we have textual evidence of them prior to 37 AD.