Some things being above reason

[abaris]

This does not translate into evidence of some creator deity. Certainly not a theistic god that cares about how much you worship him. Even if we all agreed there had to be a creator, that will only get you as far as deism, or pantheism.

As a matter of fact, I left christianity a long time ago, but it was still a long time till I called myself a real atheist. For years, I had this concept you describe above. A neutral uncaring force was my god concept until I realized I only followed the god of the gaps.