-Require that all USians learn Maori as a second language. Street signs and official documents printed in same.
-Terminate all government employees with four or more words in their title. For example, 'Assistant Undersecretary, Commerce' could stay. 'Assistant Undersecretary, Bolivian Jockstrap Weaving', however, would have to clean out his desk.
-Require all fast-food eateries (can't bring myself to call them 'restaurants') to have the words 'Eat A Fucking Salad, Fer Chirssakes' incorporated into all menus and advertising.
-Ban celebrities (athletes, film stars, television personalities, fiction authors) from giving opinions on fields not their specialty, on pain of deportation. The next time Angelina Jolie starts banging on about the evils of nuclear power, she would have to go live in Zambia for a year.
-Ditto for people who take these celebrities seriously.
-All creationist organisations will be required to add '...And Clown College' to their official letterhead.
-CEOs who make more than 10 times the annual salary of their average employee will be required to live on the salary of their lowest paid employee for one year, and we all get to watch.
-Physicians and lawyers will be required to perform 500 pro bono hours work per year.
-Parents who refuse to have their children vaccinated will be charged with child endangerment, their children will be vaccinated anyway.
-Ditto parents who refuse medical treatment for a child on religious or any other grounds.
Boru
-Terminate all government employees with four or more words in their title. For example, 'Assistant Undersecretary, Commerce' could stay. 'Assistant Undersecretary, Bolivian Jockstrap Weaving', however, would have to clean out his desk.
-Require all fast-food eateries (can't bring myself to call them 'restaurants') to have the words 'Eat A Fucking Salad, Fer Chirssakes' incorporated into all menus and advertising.
-Ban celebrities (athletes, film stars, television personalities, fiction authors) from giving opinions on fields not their specialty, on pain of deportation. The next time Angelina Jolie starts banging on about the evils of nuclear power, she would have to go live in Zambia for a year.
-Ditto for people who take these celebrities seriously.
-All creationist organisations will be required to add '...And Clown College' to their official letterhead.
-CEOs who make more than 10 times the annual salary of their average employee will be required to live on the salary of their lowest paid employee for one year, and we all get to watch.
-Physicians and lawyers will be required to perform 500 pro bono hours work per year.
-Parents who refuse to have their children vaccinated will be charged with child endangerment, their children will be vaccinated anyway.
-Ditto parents who refuse medical treatment for a child on religious or any other grounds.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
