(January 5, 2015 at 4:33 pm)alpha male Wrote: Men can avoid sexual temptation by avoiding strip clubs. Problem drinkers can avoid bars. Dieters can refrain from keeping junk food in the house. Problem gamblers can avoid casinos, or self-ban themselves in some states. This is simple, common-sense stuff. It's amusing to see some of you fight it.
Let's take this and run with it, shall we?
Drinking, gambling, going to strip clubs. All behaviors that can be problematic, to be sure.
It appears to be your contention that one partner going to strip clubs is in and of itself unfaithful. What about the others?
Let's do a thought experiment.
Couple A: One partner has a substance abuse problem, and it is an agreed parameter that said partner will stay sober and will stay out of bars.
Couple B: One partner has a gambling problem, and it likewise is an agreed parameter that said partner will not gamble or go into gambling establishments.
Couple C: One partner has a problem with sexual infidelity, and has agreed to stay out of strip clubs and not solicit lap dances.
Couple D: Both partners agree that neither has a problem with substance abuse, gambling, or sexual fidelity, and that drinking, gambling, and going to strip clubs is explicitly agreeable behavior within the relationship.
I would submit that infidelity occurs when the partner in Couple A drinks or frequents bars, the partner in Couple B gambles or goes into a casino, or the partner in Couple C goes into a strip club for whatever reason.
On the other hand, I submit that infidelity does *not* occur if a partner in Couple D does any of those same things - because those behaviors are mutually, and explicitly agreeable to both parties.
It isn't the behavior per se that indicates infidelity, it's the behavior when judged against the agreement between the two parties that does. You're trying to insert your own idea of what's best, what's moral, and what's infidelity or not where it's not your business.
