Going Back & Finding Nothing There

[JuliaL]

I looked around me at all these horrible people. I chatted with those I always used to seek out when I attended and they were cold, critical and above all, totally without humor. I couldn't stand to be with them and couldn't wait to leave.
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When I left the church no one contacted me at all.
<snip>
I just saw them as they are, nasty people in a big social club for those who hear voices.

I've never had religious faith. So I don't have any experiences similar to those of people who've lost theirs.
But the situations you describe are wholly consistent with my model of religions, their purposes and persistence in society. Religions are organized human social activities that emerge from the bubbling stew of human interaction. The successful ones have some common characteristic properties and guiding behaviors: carrots and sticks. The warm fuzzies from other members is a carrot, the cold shoulder if you leave is a stick. Shunning used to be much more effective. Not that a isolated person no longer needs community support. We still have that. It's still hard to survive 'in the wild' without help. But someone who leaves their local society now has more opportunity to feed themselves without help from the ones they left behind. Xenophobia still exists in communities, think biases against the latest immigrants. But you're much less likely to be killed by the tribe you're trying to enter than you used to be.
Like here for instance we're pretty welcoming.
Unless you prove to be a nutter.