RE: Where is everybody when it comes to 1 Corinthians 7:3-5?
July 5, 2015 at 7:13 pm
(This post was last modified: July 5, 2015 at 7:16 pm by Randy Carson.)
(July 5, 2015 at 7:01 pm)IanHulett Wrote:(July 5, 2015 at 6:52 pm)popsthebuilder Wrote: The verse speaks of the unity of marriage. Once married you are one. Are you undecided at times as an individual? Yes, and it isn't a good thing. It simply says that in marriage it is give and take, and for the sake of the marriage you shouldn't keep your partner from having sex with you unless you have a good reason, and doing so will lead your partner to look elsewhere.
It isn't used often in reference e because it can easily be misinterpreted.
The problem though is that it says (4) The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.
That to me sounds like I have no right to say no in a marriage, that if I'm not up to it, and my spouse asks for it, he/she wants it, therefore, it's a yes, even if I don't want it. It's clear. The wife DOES NOT have authority over HER OWN BODY, but yields it to the husband, and vice versa. How am I misunderstanding?
This is part of the Christian understanding that man and woman become ONE flesh in marriage. Paul also speaks eloquently about loving your wife as you love your own body, etc.
As someone who has been sacramentally married for more than 25 years, let me say that there are times when either the husband or the spouse may want to say no, and the other needs to respect that. There are also times when one spouse wants to have sex and the other doesn't but goes ahead for the benefit of the one who is desirous. (I don't always want to go to the grocery store or take out the trash, either, but I do it anyway. Married life is like that.)
Early in our marriage (like first year) we implemented two bedtime rules:
1. Sleeper's rights. The person NOT reading and being kept awake by the other's reading light has the right to say, "Sleeper's rights!" and the reader must turn off the light within five minutes.
2. The 72-hour rule. We try to never go more than 72 hours without sex except by mutual consent as Paul suggested.
One other point: It isn't necessary to cook up a three-course meal when a quick snack is all that is necessary. If one spouse wants a quickie, let her have it. Or vice-versa.
