Being An Atheist Is Humbling

[abaris]

I wish I'd had your insight at that age; I was a potato back then, full of preprogrammed thoughts, incapable of thinking for myself. My journey to reason started later and lasted longer, I think.

Well, don't wish for it. For a while, as I said in a different thread, I virtually lay awake, worrying for my parents and brother. It was child abuse, plain and simple. But I managed to reason it out. If, as they claimed, there was a good god, he wouldn't do anything like that. But that didn't fit with their narrative of punishing others for what I have done. So something had to be off.

I also remember, since it was at the time when I took my first communion, that they played that old song - I think it's called holy, holy, holy in english. There's that passage about god never having any beginning and being eternal in the lyrics. Can't be arsed to look that up, but in German it reads "Er, der nie begonnen, er, der immer war, ewig ist und waltet, sein wird immerdar". It roughly translates into: He, who never started, he, who always was, he, who is eternal, he, who will always be. Now, I was always a child spending a lot of time in his own head. Always pondering, always reflecting. And that just didn't add up for me.