RE: The Last Movie You Watched
July 10, 2022 at 7:05 pm
(This post was last modified: July 10, 2022 at 7:14 pm by Rev. Rye.)
This week in the Deep Hurting Project: Zoo Wars.
Or you can re-watch Spaceballs on Tubi.
Next week, I'll either take on The Avengers (not the one everyone knows; the one based on the 1960s British spy series), or, if ExpressVPN won't let me access Netflix Japan when I'm up in Wisconsin, Joe Piscopo: A Night at Club Piscopo.
- So, it's a battle of Nice vs. Mice? Well, at least they're not plagiarising the opening crawl to A New Hope.
- Why did they have to re-explain the significance of the Chosen one when they already explained it in the opening crawl, which just fucking happened? Did they need to repeat it in the most ear-bleeding tone of voice?
- Also, this was apparently done by the same people who did Star Paws. And, alas, it looks like they're not going to go for the same live action/animation hybrid they did for that one.
- Also, what's the point of calling the universe the zooverse? Is this the parallel world where zoophiles are right about animals being able to consent.
- These computer keys are too small for your toes? At least you have hands.
- So, the chosen one is a psychotic elephant called Nuke. Got it.
- This movie's 70 minutes and 9 seconds long, is there so little material that they had to draw out "press enter?"
- Princess Sparklefeather? I thought Twilight Sparkle kept her name when she became an alicorn.
- You've got a trilogy whose combined length is over six hours, do you really have to draw everything out just to get it to 70 minutes?
- You've got one potentially good joke, about how B-52 is named after a new wave band, and yet you get the decade wrong? Or are their covers of "Meet the Flintstones" or the theme song to "Rocko's Modern Life" the only things you remember of them?
- Huh. Nice to know that they had the foresight to parody DJ from Last Jedi before the Sequel Trilogy was a thing.
- Is this going to be Tarkin-Hippo's running gag? Being gay and attracted to Boo Boo Squeal?
- You know, for someone named Sparklefeather, I'm noticing a noticable
- So is that the power of the Sauce? Just naming sauces? Not even using them on anyone?
- And we're going to be pedantic about the difference between myths and legends?
- You know, I was almost so engrossed in who won the black hole wars that I almost forgot about the Jabberjaw reference.
- Is it weird that I wish I was able to actually find a copy of Ratatoing for the Project?
- It's about two thirds of the movie, is The Sauce actually doing anything other than naming sauces?
- So, the Not-Obi Wan is more Not-Sequel Trilogy Luke. I just looked it up and the movie was actually made in 2018. So maybe the references to The Last Jedi might actually be more intentional than expected.
- So, they basically mind-wiped the Chosen One because he was going to take over the world? And the same thing happened to Boo Boo Squeal, but he didn't mind-wipe him?
- And he's not even the chosen one? Except he's actually a flea on his earlobe? Did everybody involve smoke a bowl before writing or doing the voice acting?
- Why the fuck is there hardly any action in the film? You'd think there would be at least some. You'd think there'd be some off-brand lightsaber battles. Christ, I'd at least settle for everyone making the lightsaber noise with their mouths. But the big climax? The flea removes himself from the elephant's earlobe, somehow gets in Boo Boo Squeal's ship and tickles him until he stops being evil.
Or you can re-watch Spaceballs on Tubi.
Next week, I'll either take on The Avengers (not the one everyone knows; the one based on the 1960s British spy series), or, if ExpressVPN won't let me access Netflix Japan when I'm up in Wisconsin, Joe Piscopo: A Night at Club Piscopo.
Comparing the Universal Oneness of All Life to Yo Mama since 2010.
I was born with the gift of laughter and a sense the world is mad.
I was born with the gift of laughter and a sense the world is mad.