I can’t get any help from other Christians on religious message boards. After they read about my problems, they claim my faith isn’t genuine. Others say my issue is with the church I attend, but that isn’t true: Every week I go to the United Methodist Church, a progressive denomination. They accept homosexuals and even allow gay marriage. Their sermons are uplifting as well; they aren’t like fire and brimstone preachers you find in various unaffiliated Baptist churches. Basically, progressive churches don’t rebuke people for their imperfections and make their congregants feel like horrible people for failing to live up to impossible standards.
So what am I going through? What is bothering me so much that I need help and advice?
God has been nitpicking at all my flaws, however insignificant. If I were to do something completely harmless such as have a glass of wine, God tells me I committed an atrocious sin. Then he makes me suffer for it greatly; that suffering being a result of his will, not natural circumstances. In other words, God likes to punish me for enjoying a glass of wine.
I asked God what the hell is so wrong with having a sip of wine. His response is always the same: He believe that because a very small percentage of people drink irresponsibly and kill others in car accidents that, therefore, no one can ever be allowed to consume alcohol.
His logic is childish and unfair. His fallacious way of thinking here isn’t any different than a person with left-wing political views who wants to ban guns. Many leftists say guns ought to be illegal because a very small percentage of gun-owners kill people in school shootings, or otherwise kill people with guns when they shouldn’t have. When you consider that US civilians own 393 million firearms and that only a small number of people get killed in school shooting or ‘hood shoot-outs, that’s a very small number of homicides relative to the total number of guns that gun-owners in America possess.
It isn’t fair to implement Prohibition because of a small percentage of idiots who kill others in car accidents. There are many responsible drinkers who never kill anyone while driving drunk. By the same token, it isn’t fair to ban all guns because a small percentage of psychos kill others with firearms. There are many responsible gun-owners who never kill anyone while owning a firearm.
I pointed out this analogy to God. No matter how much sense I make, no matter how fair or well-reasoned my argument is, he doesn’t care. He won’t change his view and tells me I have to suffer by never drinking alcohol ever again!
By the way, I confronted God about the Bible’s apparent approval of drinking alcohol in the Bible. Jesus turned water into wine in the Gospels, and he also drank wine during the Last Supper. Eventually God spoke to me in an audible voice and told me it was misinformation. Given that Catholics have a sacrament called Eucharist—where they eat bread and drink actual wine to celebrate becoming one with Jesus—I wondered how God could have allowed such a great sacrament to take root in the Church given how much he appears to despise alcohol. He didn’t answer me about that.
God’s nitpicking behavior extends into many aspects of my life, and I can’t stand it. I’ve written close to 600 words now, so I don’t feel like writing much more and providing other examples of this (maybe I will in follow-up posts). But trust me: I feel like I have walk on eggshells my entire life, and it is driving me mad!
I don’t feel like a free person. I feel like I have to closely monitor all my thoughts, words, and actions so my conduct is in-line with what God wants. Unfortunately for me, that usually isn’t possible because God has to be a jerk and tell me I committed this little tiny sin or made that little tiny error—his response to me, therefore, is to suffer the consequences. He won’t help or change.
I’m miserable. Just truly miserable. I want my freedom in the worst way, but God’s excessive fault-finding is ruining everything!
So what am I going through? What is bothering me so much that I need help and advice?
God has been nitpicking at all my flaws, however insignificant. If I were to do something completely harmless such as have a glass of wine, God tells me I committed an atrocious sin. Then he makes me suffer for it greatly; that suffering being a result of his will, not natural circumstances. In other words, God likes to punish me for enjoying a glass of wine.
I asked God what the hell is so wrong with having a sip of wine. His response is always the same: He believe that because a very small percentage of people drink irresponsibly and kill others in car accidents that, therefore, no one can ever be allowed to consume alcohol.
His logic is childish and unfair. His fallacious way of thinking here isn’t any different than a person with left-wing political views who wants to ban guns. Many leftists say guns ought to be illegal because a very small percentage of gun-owners kill people in school shootings, or otherwise kill people with guns when they shouldn’t have. When you consider that US civilians own 393 million firearms and that only a small number of people get killed in school shooting or ‘hood shoot-outs, that’s a very small number of homicides relative to the total number of guns that gun-owners in America possess.
It isn’t fair to implement Prohibition because of a small percentage of idiots who kill others in car accidents. There are many responsible drinkers who never kill anyone while driving drunk. By the same token, it isn’t fair to ban all guns because a small percentage of psychos kill others with firearms. There are many responsible gun-owners who never kill anyone while owning a firearm.
I pointed out this analogy to God. No matter how much sense I make, no matter how fair or well-reasoned my argument is, he doesn’t care. He won’t change his view and tells me I have to suffer by never drinking alcohol ever again!
By the way, I confronted God about the Bible’s apparent approval of drinking alcohol in the Bible. Jesus turned water into wine in the Gospels, and he also drank wine during the Last Supper. Eventually God spoke to me in an audible voice and told me it was misinformation. Given that Catholics have a sacrament called Eucharist—where they eat bread and drink actual wine to celebrate becoming one with Jesus—I wondered how God could have allowed such a great sacrament to take root in the Church given how much he appears to despise alcohol. He didn’t answer me about that.
God’s nitpicking behavior extends into many aspects of my life, and I can’t stand it. I’ve written close to 600 words now, so I don’t feel like writing much more and providing other examples of this (maybe I will in follow-up posts). But trust me: I feel like I have walk on eggshells my entire life, and it is driving me mad!
I don’t feel like a free person. I feel like I have to closely monitor all my thoughts, words, and actions so my conduct is in-line with what God wants. Unfortunately for me, that usually isn’t possible because God has to be a jerk and tell me I committed this little tiny sin or made that little tiny error—his response to me, therefore, is to suffer the consequences. He won’t help or change.
I’m miserable. Just truly miserable. I want my freedom in the worst way, but God’s excessive fault-finding is ruining everything!
