Well, shall i begin?
Perhaps i'm not a very good conversion story, but i'd like to tell it anyway.
I was born an atheist. As we all i, i believe. I was also born to very loving atheist parents. They tried to make the best decision for me when i started school, which at the time and considering the reputation of local public schools, was a seventh-day adventist school for kindergarten - year 12.
Naturally, i was influenced greatly by my schooling growing up. I was outcast somewhat by teachers and principals because i was a "trouble maker" and a "devil's child". From the innocent age of 5 i was questioning even some of the most basic Christian values - and they didn't like this.
I think it's a very difficult idea for a six year old to grasp that everyone is born a sinner - and that sin is ultimately the worst thing in the world, and eventually not only leads to your death but an eternal hell of torture!
And honestly, the idea of a man named Jesus standing in every corner of the room, watching me all the time creeped me out. I never understood how Jesus' dying on the cross saved our sins. I still struggle to grasp the logic in the concept.
I remember my mum telling me the principal rang her to tell her i'd be causing trouble among the kids in year one, when i kept asking, "well is god is jesus' father, then who is god's dad?"
Anyway, to cut a long story short, at the ever so impressionable age of 15 (when teenagers are usually meant to be peer-pressured into drugs and sex) i was "became christian".
This only lasted about six months.
And i'm surprised it lasted that long.
I tried so damn hard to believe. I tried so hard to "open my heart to Christ" and feel him reach out to me. But it never happened. I went to youth group with my friends, i partook in bible studies with the school chaplain...but honestly, my life had never been emptier!
A few "moments of clarity" happened though, for example, when i was once told by a pastor at a youth group that (and i quote!) "if you want to go to heaven tonight, walk up the front here and put whatever money you have to jesus christ!"
Another was when i actually started reading the bible. Apart from my innate sense of reason and logic, the bible was the most primary reason for my atheism. The bible did not answer questions for me, rather it contradicted what i thought were very clear ideals. The old testament, quite frankly frightened me.
So, basically. . . despite my little six month teenage phase of evangelism, my whole life i felt like i've always had instilled in me this desire to understand reason and science.
I study science now at university and couldn't imagine myself being more convinced in atheism.
I've had some Christians friends say to me over the years, "Oh, but you must not let your bad experiences of Christianity turn you off" but although i've witnessed some seriously fucked up things within the seventh day adventist community and experienced some severe psychological scarring, this was not the primary reason for my departure from religion. Because let's face it - all christians face the same stuff i did, they are either more fearful, in denial or just perhaps ignorant tot he fact that THERE ISN'T ANYTHING THERE.
Anyway, i've rambled far too long! I'll continue to write about my thoughts on atheism and religion in other threads. But i hope some people enjoyed my conversion story
Now, go nuts! I would love to hear everyone else's stories and thoughts.
Perhaps i'm not a very good conversion story, but i'd like to tell it anyway.
I was born an atheist. As we all i, i believe. I was also born to very loving atheist parents. They tried to make the best decision for me when i started school, which at the time and considering the reputation of local public schools, was a seventh-day adventist school for kindergarten - year 12.
Naturally, i was influenced greatly by my schooling growing up. I was outcast somewhat by teachers and principals because i was a "trouble maker" and a "devil's child". From the innocent age of 5 i was questioning even some of the most basic Christian values - and they didn't like this.
I think it's a very difficult idea for a six year old to grasp that everyone is born a sinner - and that sin is ultimately the worst thing in the world, and eventually not only leads to your death but an eternal hell of torture!
And honestly, the idea of a man named Jesus standing in every corner of the room, watching me all the time creeped me out. I never understood how Jesus' dying on the cross saved our sins. I still struggle to grasp the logic in the concept.
I remember my mum telling me the principal rang her to tell her i'd be causing trouble among the kids in year one, when i kept asking, "well is god is jesus' father, then who is god's dad?"
Anyway, to cut a long story short, at the ever so impressionable age of 15 (when teenagers are usually meant to be peer-pressured into drugs and sex) i was "became christian".
This only lasted about six months.
And i'm surprised it lasted that long.
I tried so damn hard to believe. I tried so hard to "open my heart to Christ" and feel him reach out to me. But it never happened. I went to youth group with my friends, i partook in bible studies with the school chaplain...but honestly, my life had never been emptier!
A few "moments of clarity" happened though, for example, when i was once told by a pastor at a youth group that (and i quote!) "if you want to go to heaven tonight, walk up the front here and put whatever money you have to jesus christ!"
Another was when i actually started reading the bible. Apart from my innate sense of reason and logic, the bible was the most primary reason for my atheism. The bible did not answer questions for me, rather it contradicted what i thought were very clear ideals. The old testament, quite frankly frightened me.
So, basically. . . despite my little six month teenage phase of evangelism, my whole life i felt like i've always had instilled in me this desire to understand reason and science.
I study science now at university and couldn't imagine myself being more convinced in atheism.
I've had some Christians friends say to me over the years, "Oh, but you must not let your bad experiences of Christianity turn you off" but although i've witnessed some seriously fucked up things within the seventh day adventist community and experienced some severe psychological scarring, this was not the primary reason for my departure from religion. Because let's face it - all christians face the same stuff i did, they are either more fearful, in denial or just perhaps ignorant tot he fact that THERE ISN'T ANYTHING THERE.
Anyway, i've rambled far too long! I'll continue to write about my thoughts on atheism and religion in other threads. But i hope some people enjoyed my conversion story
Now, go nuts! I would love to hear everyone else's stories and thoughts.
