Real life discussions never again

[pineapplebunnybounce]

I'm ok with having discussions in real life, more enjoyable for me. But disagreements, yes, written is best. That is the only advantage I truly miss I don't mind if people start yelling me I'm pretty good at dealing with that, but as long as it's written. I hate not being able to point to something and say "this is where you're wrong".

[Jackalope]

I know what you mean. I'd rather do this in writing for all the same reasons.

I actually proposed to the guy that we have a debate on a forum sometime.

Our exchange went thusly:
"why?? they ccould just be copy n pasting other ppls works n shit!! they might just be sum snot nozed 12 year old punk who dunt understand what theyre even sayin!!"
"Why is that relevant? Your opponents intelligence isn't what's up for debate. It matters what's said, not who's say-"
"NO OF COURSE IT MATTERS WHOS THE ONE SAYIN IT LIKE WTF WHAT IF THEY DONT EVENJ HAVE PIECES OF PAPER THAT TELL ME THEYRE SMART THEYRE ALL FUKKIN LIARS ABOUT THEIR EDUCATION."
"You're coming dangerously close to committing an argument from authority fallacy. Like I said, it doesn't matter who they are, it matters what they'r-"
And then he continued to raise his voice, drowning out my responses, committing fallacies left and right - and not a single reasonable thing was said by him thereafter.

Whatta cock.

I bet he doesn't even lift.

[Gilgamesh]

Whatta cock.

I bet he doesn't even lift.

He's almost 50, and is prettymuch physically crippled.

[Zazzy]

This makes me really sad. I am so old that when I first went to college, I still typed my papers on a typewriter (and that was still normal), so maybe I am just showing my age here, but I hate the age of texting and email, and though I enjoy internet forums, I only do it because I can't have frank conversations very often given that I am surrounded by theists.

The way things are heading reminds me of the Bruce Willis movie Surrogates, which was terrible, but the idea was really scary: living your whole life through a robot avatar while your real body sat in a sensory deprivation chamber.

I still love talking. I love to sit at bars and talk and argue and debate with someone. I love talking on the phone to my old friends who live far away. Something is missing from online talk: immediacy, tone, body language, image. It bothers me to not know what everyone looks like, or whether they're smiling or frowning when they post. It bothers me how easy it is to be dishonest online (and I don't necessarily mean lies, I just mean how easy it is to be someone who you normally aren't).

The conversations here are real, and I value them, but I like to look people in the eye and hear them laughing. I guess I am old.

[Gilgamesh]

This makes me really sad. I am so old that when I first went to college, I still typed my papers on a typewriter (and that was still normal), so maybe I am just showing my age here, but I hate the age of texting and email, and though I enjoy internet forums, I only do it because I can't have frank conversations very often given that I am surrounded by theists.

The way things are heading reminds me of the Bruce Willis movie Surrogates, which was terrible, but the idea was really scary: living your whole life through a robot avatar while your real body sat in a sensory deprivation chamber.

I still love talking. I love to sit at bars and talk and argue and debate with someone. I love talking on the phone to my old friends who live far away. Something is missing from online talk: immediacy, tone, body language, image. It bothers me to not know what everyone looks like, or whether they're smiling or frowning when they post. It bothers me how easy it is to be dishonest online (and I don't necessarily mean lies, I just mean how easy it is to be someone who you normally aren't).

The conversations here are real, and I value them, but I like to look people in the eye and hear them laughing. I guess I am old.

Shooting the shit with friends is still cool in real life. But if you're going to debate, I find it's best done on a discussion board, as opposed to in-person.

[Angrboda]

I don't know how I feel about this. I find it's just different, not better or worse. I would suggest that if you find yourself in such conversations, slow yourself down, let the other finish before responding, lower your expectations some, speak simply and concretely, ask more questions, and accept that, whether live or memorex, persuasion is a rather high bar to meet.

On the other hand, I'm very solitary, and prefer my solitude, though I break it for intense, focused discussions at book clubs and such a few times a week. I prefer my forums, my music, and my books to a full social life. I ended my friendship with the one friend I had in November, and have no real interest making any effort to acquire a new one. I'm introverted, shy, and one of those people who has a few very close friends, and am only loosely acquainted with more than that.

[Zazzy]

Shooting the shit with friends is still cool in real life. But if you're going to debate, I find it's best done on a discussion board, as opposed to in-person.

I think possibly you feel that way because you're not bound by the same rules you would be in real life, and I'm not sure whether or not that's good or bad. If you want to debate god issues, this is probably the type of place. I can't imagine wanting to do it in real life. But most of what goes on here is not debating; it's arguing. And arguing is a great way to meet people- over books, music, politics... friendly arguments are GREAT in real life.

[Gilgamesh]

I would suggest that if you find yourself in such conversations, slow yourself down, let the other finish before responding, lower your expectations some, speak simply and concretely, ask more questions, and accept that, whether live or memorex, persuasion is a rather high bar to meet.

I am very non-confrontational in person. For every 10 minutes of speech by him, I make 1 minutes worth (This is an estimation but by no means a purposeful exaggeration.) Sincerely, what you suggest is already my normal means of orated communication. This guy talks a lot, and a lot of the stories he tells me are fabrication, I believe (unless you believe he played Battlefield with Jon Stewart and that he was asked to join mensa.) I nod my head and pretend to consider his endless rambling, most the time. The few times I speak up, I usually end up regretting it.

[Jackalope]

But if you're going to debate, I find it's best done on a discussion board, as opposed to in-person.

I would tend to agree - except possibly when it's either in a formal debate setting, or when it's with someone who's decent enough that they won't pull all the bullshit that you talked about in your OP. I personally wouldn't do a formal meatspace debate, and most of the people who I might debate otherwise aren't people who I'd particularly want to.

[Gilgamesh]

On the other hand, I'm very solitary, and prefer my solitude, though I break it for intense, focused discussions at book clubs and such a few times a week. I prefer my forums, my music, and my books to a full social life. I ended my friendship with the one friend I had in November, and have no real interest making any effort to acquire a new one. I'm introverted, shy, and one of those people who has a few very close friends, and am only loosely acquainted with more than that.

I have no friends, either. I will be your friend (◕‿◕✿)