why does the Islamic heaven sound as gaudy as a russian pimps bedroom?

[paulpablo]

"The tent is a hollowed out pearl, thirty miles high; in each corner of it the believer will have a wife whom no one else can see"

"Houris [beautiful, fair females] restrained in pavilions"

"There is no tree in Paradise that does not have a trunk made of gold"

I love the idea of living in a tropical garden paradise but it's pretty much ruined by not having a single nice normal wooden tree, being surrounded by trees of gold that I assume are worthless since in this heaven.

"Bricks of gold and silver, and mortar of fragrant musk, pebbles of pearl and sapphire, and soil of saffron. Whoever enters it is filled with joy and will never feel miserable; he will live there forever and never die; their clothes will never wear out and their youth will never fade."

These descriptions of heaven aren't in the quran so they are in hadith respected by most mainstream sunni Muslims.
To me they're just more evidence that these things are fabricated by fairly short sighted primitive.

Obviously men because of all the rewards which seemingly involve sex slave women.
Primitive and short sighted because what the hell do you do with gold, pearls and silver in heaven?
I normally debate with Muslims because I do think it's more challenging than Christianity but as far as descriptions of the afterlife go, Islam has probably the most primitive unrealistic idea of heaven than any religion.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8ibe47F6j4
4 minutes 30 seconds into this video
the video goes into more detail about the jealousy and backbiting in heaven. The women who came from earth to heaven will be given status over the women already created in heaven (the sex slaves). The women of earth will mock the women of heaven in the form of some sort of song because they never prayed, fasted or gave to charity in the name of allah.

I'd probably rather go to valhalla, they still have annoying trees of gold there but there seems to be less monotony and having everything handed to you on a plate, there's more fighting and honing of warrior skills rather than the back stabbing bitchy jelousy that goes on in jannah.

[ignoramus]

So they bitch when they're alive and they bitch when they die!

They have their own saying:
LIFE'S A BITCH, THEN YOU DIE, AND THEN BITCH SOME MORE!

[DramaQueen]

What do the celibate gay people get?

[Anomalocaris]

RE: why does the Islamic heaven sound as gaudy as a russian pimps bedroom?

Because there is overlap between the bottom of seedy low taste in Russia and the top of sublime transcendence in Islam?

[dissily mordentroge]

"Houris [beautiful, fair females] restrained in pavilions" ? ? ? ?
This is essentially a later mistranslation of the Koran, which like the Judeo Christian bible is riddled with forgeries, deleted passages and later distortions.
Many academic studies of the oldest texts upon which the Koran is based gives 'Houris' a definition of something like spirit entities who can be changed at will by their owners into virgin females, virgin males or even goats if that's their thing. I'll leave the remainder to your fertile imaginations.

---

What do the celibate gay people get?

Stoned to death and sent to hell according to the Koran and the so called Holy Bible.

[paulpablo]

What do the celibate gay people get?

This is exactly what was going through my mind.