The Newly Departed thread: announcements (departures)

[Mystic]

He needs to find his niche in himself, the light within him, and he has to let go of this no free-will thing for sure.

May God and the Guides of the past all help him discover his true self.

[Shell B]

Yeah, the no free-will thing doesn't help him at all. Even if it were true, he's clearly taken it to a self-damaging level.

Anyway, I can feel this thread trickling away. Let's hope I'm right.

[brewer]

Maybe H will step in an answer that for me.

MHB, I have to be honest here, I've seen you provoke him completely unnecessarily for no reason... several times. I just don't understand what the point is of doing that.

I guess I'm just mean then.

Why don't you show me where I provoked him and we'll discuss it.

[Catholic_Lady]

 You can simply just choose to not say anything. You already know what's gonna happen if you do, so why do it?"   

This is a forum. We're literally here to talk. My point is that it shouldn't happen, and no one else should feel like they need to actively ignore him in order to be able to participate in discussions here.

I add the caveat that I know for a fact that I'm a bitchy queen. I say bitchy things to bitchy people. I get into it with people who are abrasive, likely because I can be abrasive. It's like cats honing their claws on your furniture. I get it all out with people who are equally bitchy. I doubt anyone could find an instance of me doing it to a nice person, but my point is that I am not without similar flaws to Hammy. I'm just pretty damn sure I have a large measure more self control. He could benefit from more of it, and it has made me sad in the past that he doesn't make any effort in that department. He really, really needs to work on some things. His friends should keep trying to help him. I've tried as much as I can for someone I'm not close to.

Yes, we are here to talk. But for me, there are some people here who I choose not to engage with. Either because they are dishonest or because all they do is comment at me with insults lol. The point is, I know having a productive conversation with those particular people is not possible, so I save myself the stress and drama and just ignore them.  

And trust me, I'm talking to Ham right now and trying to convey to him how important it is that he learn to control his emotions and let things go.

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MHB, I have to be honest here, I've seen you provoke him completely unnecessarily for no reason... several times. I just don't understand what the point is of doing that.

I guess I'm just mean then.

Why don't you show me where I provoked him and we'll discuss it.

Well, here is one example lol: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54645-p...pid1744785

[Shell B]

*cringes* Good luck. He's going to tell you he does let things go. He's not actually being emotional. He doesn't know why people think he's emotional. Just because he's being honest doesn't mean he's mad. He tried to act differently, but people just got mad at him. Etc., etc. If you get a different reaction, good for you. If any of that sounds familiar . . . well, we've been trying to tell you. I honestly hope you have some success. He's stubborn as all fuck.

Also, tell him to stop reading this thread. He's left for a reason. It's not doing him any favors to sit around stewing on it like the rest of us.

[Mystic]

IT's better to talk to him CL as you would any other, and let him learn and not give him special treatment in my view.

I benefited more from my friends' advice psychologically more then all advice of psychologists and professional working with me.

And there is a woman who I talked to on the bus and who we worked together a lot in computer science, and the only reason why I stopped talking to her is due to respecting her relationship with her boyfriend, but she was very harsh at times, but I appreciate her harshness and advice that helped me more than any professional could.

We got to be real to him, and not teach wisdom is meant for people and then some mutated wisdom is to be taught for mentally ill and not non-mentally ill people.

[brewer]

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I guess I'm just mean then.

Why don't you show me where I provoked him and we'll discuss it.

Well, here is one example lol: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54645-p...pid1744785

And yet he kudosed the post. He got that one. Try again.

[Catholic_Lady]

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Well, here is one example lol: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54645-p...pid1744785

And yet he kudosed the post. He got that one. Try again.

Ok, here's another: https://atheistforums.org/post-1762654.html#pid1762654

[KevinM1]

23 pages and counting with Hammy-gate.

[Angrboda]

And yet he kudosed the post. He got that one. Try again.

Ok, here's another: https://atheistforums.org/post-1762654.html#pid1762654

I think there's a difference between just making a snarky comment and intentionally provoking someone. I think you may be reading an intent which doesn't exist there. Determining intent from behavior is often hard, but I don't see MH's comments as anything other than innocent. If you're saying one should avoid making snarky comments around Hammy because they might provoke him, then perhaps Shell has a point about you.