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I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 11:46 am
(This post was last modified: May 1, 2015 at 12:47 pm by rexbeccarox.
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about a week ago.my views were always pretty liberal even when i was a Muslim and some friends jokingly used to call me an Atheist long before i actually became an Atheist,I didn't want to become an Atheist but its not something that i have any control over I just couldn't believe anymore,I hope you will understand,the problem is that I've been pretty depressed ever since i became an Atheist,i am experiencing extreme emotions like anger and sadness,becoming an Atheist is not as simple as i thought i have to consider my whole life over and i cant even tell anyone that i became an Atheist i am surrounded by Muslims and not very open minded ones if they get an idea that i actually became an Atheist then i don't know what they will do,I will be isolated from the society and i wonder how will i live the rest of my life how will i raise my children,how will becoming an Atheist affect my morals,i am famous for helping others and i believe i am a kind person but people wont care about all of that they will just hate me when they find out and i don't know for how long i can keep it down,i wish there was someone to talk to but i dont know any other Atheist and i cant trust people online,what should be my next move? and how should i change my life after being an Atheist?
thanks
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I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 11:53 am
about a week ago.my views were always pretty liberal even when i was a Muslim and some friends jokingly used to call me an Atheist long before i actually became an Atheist,I didn't want to become an Atheist but its not something that i have any control over I just couldn't believe anymore,I hope you will understand,the problem is that I've been pretty depressed ever since i became an Atheist,i am experiencing extreme emotions like anger and sadness,becoming an Atheist is not as simple as i thought i have to consider my whole life over and i cant even tell anyone that i became an Atheist i am surrounded by Muslims and not very open minded ones if they get an idea that i actually became an Atheist then i don't know what they will do,I will be isolated from the society and i wonder how will i live the rest of my life how will i raise my children,how will becoming an Atheist affect my morals,i am famous for helping others and i believe i am a kind person but people wont care about all of that they will just hate me when they find out and i don't know for how long i can keep it down,i wish there was someone to talk to but i dont know any other Atheist and i cant trust people online,what should be my next move? and how should i change my life after being an Atheist?
thanks
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 11:59 am
(This post was last modified: May 1, 2015 at 12:01 pm by robvalue.)
Hello Twisted, welcome
I'm very sorry to hear about the pressure you feel. It must be very frustrating not to be able to be honest with those around you due to rejection, I fully understand that. It will be a matter of weighing up the possible harm to you telling them will cause, against the benefit of being able to be honest. That's not an easy decision to make. If you tell us more, maybe we can help.
There is no reason your life has to change at all now you're an atheist, it's just being honest with yourself that you no longer believe. There is no rule book for atheism, you do what you think is right. You have a big atheist audience here, so you can talk to your heart's content to us about anything you like. That will give you a way of venting and coping with the change, even if you can't tell people around you.
You are right, it's not a choice. If you don't believe something, it is a state of mind. But fundamentalist types do not or will not understand that unfortunately.
Being an atheist shouldn't affect your morals at all, morality comes from inside you. Religion pretends it comes from God or whatever, but that's nonsense. You're the same person you were, you just realize you've been misled. "Treat others how you would want to be treated" is pretty much the basis of any good moral system.
Dealing with kids is difficult. Are you with their mother, and if so does she know how you feel? How religious is she?
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 11:59 am
(May 1, 2015 at 11:53 am)Twisted Wrote: how will becoming an Atheist affect my morals
If you consider yourself to be a good person then I don't see how realising you lack belief in god will affect you. Morals are made by man, not gods.
I hope you find the answers to your other questions here.
Welcome!
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:05 pm
(May 1, 2015 at 11:59 am)robvalue Wrote: Hello Twisted, welcome
I'm very sorry to hear about the pressure you feel. It must be very frustrating not to be able to be honest with those around you due to rejection, I fully understand that. It will be a matter of weighing up the possible harm to you telling them will cause, against the benefit of being able to be honest. That's not an easy decision to make. If you tell us more, maybe we can help.
There is no reason your life has to change at all now you're an atheist, it's just being honest with yourself that you no longer believe. There is no rule book for atheism, you do what you think is right. You have a big atheist audience here, so you can talk to your heart's content to us about anything you like. That will give you a way of venting and coping with the change, even if you can't tell people around you.
You are right, it's not a choice. If you don't believe something, it is a state of mind. But fundamentalist types do not or will not understand that unfortunately.
Being an atheist shouldn't affect your morals at all, morality comes from inside you. Religion pretends it comes from God or whatever, but that's nonsense. You're the same person you were, you just realize you've been misled. "Treat others how you would want to be treated" is pretty much the basis of any good moral system.
Dealing with kids is difficult. Are you with their mother, and if so does she know how you feel? How religious is she?
Thanks for your support Rob and lol i don't have any children i was just wondering that when i have children how would i raise them plus how would i find an Atheist wife,I have no Atheists around me there are a lot of problems for an Atheists where i live,i wish i was in some other country
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:11 pm
(This post was last modified: May 1, 2015 at 12:13 pm by robvalue.)
You're welcome
Ah okay, I see. Can you tell us what country you are in?
Maybe you could use some sort of online dating to find possible atheist partners?
As for bringing up kids, my simple advice is to teach them how to think, not what to think. You can make them aware of different religions when they are old enough to understand what they mean, and then talk it through with them. Most likely, a kid who hasn't been indoctrinated or filled with magical thinking will recognise religious texts for what they are, ie. ridiculous stories.
Maybe my website will help, it's aimed at new atheists. It includes some advice about how/if to tell people about it and plenty more:
http://robvalue.wix.com/atheism
Don't panic, it's an important transition and it will take time to get used to in such a religious country. Many have been through it on this forum and will provide support and advice I'm sure
You are no different than before, religion wasn't doing anything. You haven't lost anything.
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:15 pm
Welcome to AF, a place filled with good-hearted atheists (don't be surprised that we exist).
Have fun!
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:15 pm
For most new atheists, those feelings of depression and anger will fade. You will discover that, other than eliminating your unsupported god beliefs, you probably haven't changed as a person.
If you were a good person as a believer, you will remain a good person as an atheist. If the only reason why you were a good person when you were a believer is because of the fear of a god, or the hope of a reward, you weren't really a good person.
Human morals originate from a combination of our evolutionary past as a social species, natural empathy, rationality, reciprocal altruism. No gods needed.
You'd believe if you just opened your heart" is a terrible argument for religion. It's basically saying, "If you bias yourself enough, you can convince yourself that this is true." If religion were true, people wouldn't need faith to believe it -- it would be supported by good evidence.
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:19 pm
Not that you would be looking for someone with differing views, but religion shouldn't always affect the relationship. My girlfriend and I have been dating for over 2 years now, and she is a fairly devout Christian. She goes to church frequently, prays before her meals, and has many friends that are also religious. She knows that I am an atheist and does not care. Religion has nothing to do with our feelings for one another, nor should it. No matter what she believes in, I love her regardless. Unfortunately, not everyone has the same views as my girlfriend, so I cannot promise that finding someone like her will be easy. But it's always worth a shot.
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RE: I recently became an Atheist
May 1, 2015 at 12:23 pm
Also a good fact to note is that you don't neccessarily need atheist friends. My best friends and coworkers are all believers in some sort of religion, leaving me as the only atheist in our group. A lot of us also believe that your religion (or lack thereof) should have no bearing with your personal and professional lifestyles.
At the end of the day, you are the same person you were before. So don't worry, be happy.
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