How to sound like an Online New Atheist

[Mr.wizard]

POE! POE! POE!

[abaris]

Just dogs like you. Back to your kennel boy.

You know, that's actually quite the compliment. But I wouldn't expect someone like you to respect dogs any more than humans.

Come on, call me gay - that's usually the first WMD in the redneck arsenal. Oh right, you already did that and I didn't give a shit. So what's next?

[Crossless2.0]

OP, keep telling us how you're a Buddhist. I could use the laughs, troll, because if you are one you must be the dumbest motherfucker to ever adhere to the teachings, which obviously haven't touched you one bit.

But you are a Poe and a troll, aren't you? It's ok, Cletus, you can admit it.

[robvalue]

Of course he is.

It stops being clever when people have already pointed it out, like we did with pious paladin instantly. People get some weird kick out of it regardless.

If in some bizarre way you're actually for real, you need to pull yourself together man.

[omnomnom]

Considering you burst onto our forum yelling crazily and wanting us to sympathise with your rampant homophobia, I'm not surprised you don't like what atheists say to you.

Maybe you should grow up and learn how to have sensible discourse first.

Many of those things you have stated in your strawman composite atheist are very true, and things you have no answer for which is why you resort to calling people assholes instead. It's not a rebuttal. If you are claiming all those statement are factually wrong, then you are so far off the mark it's not funny.

I still think you're a Poe.

My brother is an atheist. He is not an asshole. You are an atheist, but you are an asshole. Therefore I don't think atheists are assholes and only focus on the person.

Some new atheists online comment shit. Some of the shit is assholey. Therefore, some new online atheists are assholes.

Don't be a suspicious dick to me just because I was scared about my business and afterlife and I admit overreacted like a dick. Someone told me a good solution to protect my business and afterlife: "No Wedding cakes for anybody". Now you can quit crying.


If you want to keep on desperately trying to believe I'm a homophobe. Go ahead. To me, that thread is over and I won't be replying to anymore ridiculous homophobe accusations. That fights over, let bygones be bygones
Or you can keep feeling anger and butthurt over my fear of losing business and next-life protection.

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POE! POE! POE!

I still don't know what it means.

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Just dogs like you. Back to your kennel boy.

You know, that's actually quite the compliment. But I wouldn't expect someone like you to respect dogs any more than humans.

Come on, call me gay - that's usually the first WMD in the redneck arsenal. Oh right, you already did that and I didn't give a shit. So what's next?

I love gays bur I hate dogs since they bite.

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Of course he is.

It stops being clever when people have already pointed it out, like we did with pious paladin instantly. People get some weird kick out of it regardless.

If in some bizarre way you're actually for real, you need to pull yourself together man.

Whatever you want to believe boy.

[abaris]

I love gays

Well, maybe you should follow your feelings instead of fighting them.

But you're not a real person anyway. At least I hope so for humanity's sake.

[robvalue]

No, you're not a homophobe, you just want to deny them the rights that straight people have based on superstition. So much so you'd turn away business.

This thread is you being an asshole, again. You're strawmanning atheists and then expecting atheists to respond in a positive way?

Like I said, many of those things are simply facts, so if you think it's an insult to atheists pointing out facts they have said, you've really lost it.

But we all know you're not for real, so the reveal isn't going to carry much weight.

[omnomnom]

I love gays

Well, maybe you should follow your feelings instead of fighting them.

But you're not a real person anyway. At least I hope so for humanity's sake.

I love anybody who isn't a dick to me. But just because I love someone doesn't mean I'm going to let them turn me into a mosquito when I die (or ruin my business). You need to get a grip on your emotions. Yes, some conservative Christians suck and hate gays and stuff that's why you probably think I'm a fundamental dick. I'm not. I could use a million years of nirvana and that's my aim, and I'm not going to allow NOBODY to mess that up. Not even my mother.

[robvalue]

Maybe we need a "how to be a troll" thread?

Anyway, back to rock crushing. I lost my shoe and I think it was around the MXL-3000 KrushUrRox. Is there any chance I'll get it back intact?

[abaris]

Yes, some conservative Christians suck and hate gays and stuff that's why you probably think I'm a fundamental dick.

Well, maybe that's because you come over as one. And as a very curious brand of self proclaimed Buddhist at that.

That's why I have my doubt of you being a real person and not just some troll.