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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 8:40 pm
(This post was last modified: November 9, 2015 at 8:41 pm by KevinM1.)
Shared this one a few times on here, but it still makes me chuckle. When a bible pusher was, well, trying to push his bible on me at UNH, I said:
"No, thanks. Your god broke my legs."
And drove away as he simply stood there, mouth agape.
An incredibly satisfying moment.
"I was thirsty for everything, but blood wasn't my style" - Live, "Voodoo Lady"
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 8:48 pm
My favorite for the door to doors. Okay, let's talk. Show me in your book where Satan did anything but piss off god. Shuts them right up. I don't even get a "god bless you" as they walk away from that one.
You make people miserable and there's nothing they can do about it, just like god.
-- Homer Simpson
God has no place within these walls, just as facts have no place within organized religion.
-- Superintendent Chalmers
Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends. There are some things we don't want to know. Important things.
-- Ned Flanders
Once something's been approved by the government, it's no longer immoral.
-- The Rev Lovejoy
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 11:10 pm
(November 9, 2015 at 7:41 pm)Beccs Wrote: They discourage us from directly cutting open patients to find the fault.
Though, if we acted more like mechanics...
(shakes head; sucks through teeth)
"Dear oh dear, who done this bypass for you? Cor blimey, you ain't 'alf had some right bleedin' cowboys in 'ere, mate! ... I'm gonna 'ave to rip all this lot out, fit 'ole new unit in. It's gonna cost yer. Well, you can't get the parts no more y'see. Tell you what I'll do; I'll have a look in me van, see if I got something I can bodge it up with for now, til I can order the new stuff. Probably take about three weeks. S'gotta come from Japan, see. Plus I got some other jobs I gotta do. Leave it open so's the air can get round it, an' I'll get back to yer next Wednesday week. Thursday at the latest. Definitely Friday. An' if I could 'ave fifty quid on account..."
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 11:34 pm
That's uncanny.
You sound just like my boss.
Of course, he looks like a reject from Steptoe and Son...
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 11:40 pm
(November 9, 2015 at 7:41 pm)Beccs Wrote: Though, if we acted more like mechanics...
...a lot of patients would look more like Frankenstein's monster?
Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 9, 2015 at 11:43 pm
(November 9, 2015 at 11:40 pm)SnakeOilWarrior Wrote: (November 9, 2015 at 7:41 pm)Beccs Wrote: Though, if we acted more like mechanics...
...a lot of patients would look more like Frankenstein's monster?
You mean they're not supposed to?
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: Favorite Comebacks
November 10, 2015 at 7:16 am
Correct! Becc's a real doctor, not a plastic fantastic.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
