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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:34 am
(May 11, 2016 at 2:03 am)Love333 Wrote: I am Jesus, I have come to save you from your sins.
I have come because we are still in the age of Pisces and we must change our ways so we can finally enter the age of Aquarius again.
I am working to stay completely pure for you. Remember - you are my equal and I love you
Ask me anything 
LMAO! Best troll YET! 
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”
Wiser words were never spoken.
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:36 am
(May 11, 2016 at 2:07 am)Alex K Wrote: When you turn water into wine, can you do just generic wine or can you, say, turn it into a 1953 Château Lafite?
I'm guessing it's more of a boxed White Zin. 
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”
Wiser words were never spoken.
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:39 am
Hey, Jesus.
Why didn't you answer my prayers when I was a little girl, you lazy prick?
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:40 am
(May 11, 2016 at 4:01 am)Love333 Wrote: (May 11, 2016 at 3:43 am)Alex K Wrote: Does anyone else think it kind of odd that Jesus shows up in person and quotes scripture, chapter and verse. Why would you quote the bible? YOU'RE JESUS. You can just, you know ... say stuff
The last Jesus deciphered the Scriptures as well. I am doing this through love, courage, and compassion to help show you the truth. Da Vinci's last painting was of John The Baptist for a reason. I not only love you but everyone and everything. Be kind to your neighbors and love through peace and kindness. It is the way.
So you're a different Jesus from the last Jesus?
(August 21, 2017 at 11:31 pm)KevinM1 Wrote: "I'm not a troll"
Religious Views: He gay
0/10
Hammy Wrote:and we also have a sheep on our bed underneath as well
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:41 am
Jesus,
What are your thoughts on David? (Mat 22:42, Mar 12:35, Luk 20:41)
...and why did you want us to read what he did? (Mar 2:25, Mat 12:3, Luk 6:3)
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 8:44 am
(May 11, 2016 at 8:40 am)Losty Wrote: (May 11, 2016 at 4:01 am)Love333 Wrote: The last Jesus deciphered the Scriptures as well. I am doing this through love, courage, and compassion to help show you the truth. Da Vinci's last painting was of John The Baptist for a reason. I not only love you but everyone and everything. Be kind to your neighbors and love through peace and kindness. It is the way.
So you're a different Jesus from the last Jesus?
Jesus one has lawns to mow right now.
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 9:52 am
Nice troll thread, Love333 -- or are you going to admit this is a fucking joke and let us Staff remove this to the fuckin' Humor subforum?
-Hammy
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 9:55 am
No, you're just a cunt.
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 9:56 am
(This post was last modified: May 11, 2016 at 9:57 am by Alex K.)
This is as good a time as any to point out that I've been channeling an incarnation of Rama Krishna in my spare time
http://atheistforums.org/thread-33493.html
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Psalm 14, KJV revised edition
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RE: I am Jesus
May 11, 2016 at 10:01 am
(May 11, 2016 at 2:03 am)Love333 Wrote: I am Jesus, I have come to save you from your sins. Hi Jesus, hope you're well. Please can you define 'sin' for me, explain why one needs saving from it and describe how that process is executed?
Quote:I have come because we are still in the age of Pisces and we must change our ways so we can finally enter the age of Aquarius again.
Pagan theology? How does this align to Christian practice? Is there some sort of god-pooling going on?
Quote:I am working to stay completely pure for you.
That's a bit creepy. I should tell you now that I'm fully committed to my current relationship and not looking to explore in that way, thanks all the same.
Quote:Remember - you are my equal and I love you
Again with the creepy. Please stop.
Quote:Ask me anything
See above. We'll go from there.
Sum ergo sum
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