Raising an Atheist

[Simon Moon]

My wife and I are having our first child soon (she's due last week of December). We fully intend to raise our daughter secular, but I am unsure of how to handle social situations when she gets older: like if her friends are religious, or if she's excluded from social gatherings because of it.

Do you have children, and did you raise them Atheist? Did you run into any obstacles?

If you don't, what would you do? Religion, no religion, or expose them to everything and let them decide?

Unless you live in the 'Bible belt', I'm not sure there is much to worry about.

If her generation is anything like my nephew's generation, things will be fine.

My nephew is 20, and his religious friends could care that he is a nonbeliever. He'd probably get more grief if he told them he doesn't like pizza.

Each new generation is getting less and less religious, overall.

[zebo-the-fat]

None of my kids were brought up religious, never caused any problems at all, but here in the UK not many people care about your religion (or lack of it) anyway.

[mlmooney89]

My husband is Catholic and at first we decided to let him raise them with religion but since being married we kinda decided that we won't bring it up until they ask. We will tell them that people believe different things and will use our relationship to prove that different opinions doesn't make a difference in the long run. They can agree with their father if they want without hurting my feelings and it is obvious that he doesn't care who is atheist around him so they can follow me without problems either.

[Cecelia]

We taught our girls that God is something some people believe in, and something that we personally do not. It's up to them to decide if they want to believe, though most of them find religion ridiculous.

[Minimalist]

I have two sons neither of whom gives a flying fuck about religion.  We lived in NY where there was no concentration of evangelical asswipes, though.  There were plenty of jews and catholics and those two groups mainly seemed to go through the motions.  You could get in more trouble being a Mets' fan or a Yankee fan in the wrong neighborhood than which invisible sky-daddy you pretended to worship.

[comet]

My wife and I are having our first child soon (she's due last week of December). We fully intend to raise our daughter secular, but I am unsure of how to handle social situations when she gets older: like if her friends are religious, or if she's excluded from social gatherings because of it.

Do you have children, and did you raise them Atheist? Did you run into any obstacles?

If you don't, what would you do? Religion, no religion, or expose them to everything and let them decide?

if you don't teach them both sides they never can choose or interact as they need to (avoiding land mines).  I teach my kids religion, the good parts and the bad parts.  They will get to decide and if they need false hope till they can walk on their own, so be it.

[Joods]

My kids know I'm atheist. Two of them have joined here, but interaction has been minimal. They know where I stand but we don't make a habit of telling them what we think they should think or believe.

In time, they will be able to make their own decisions and I'm fine with whatever they believe. That being said, we don't go to church, but we have in the past, when I did believe. I want them to question things. All things. And if there is no answer, we don't make one up nor will we tell them "god did it".

Kids don't come with manuals and we all just do the best we can.

[Thumpalumpacus]

I am raising mine to be a critical thinker and make his own decisions as to what he believes.

This, exactly. Teach them how to think, not what to think.

It worked with my son.

[Qwraith]

Just be sure to love your children unconditionally regardless of what they end up believing as they transition into adulthood. It's important they know that no matter what you'll always be there for them. And always remember that despite all your efforts, they may not turn out how you expect them to. Outside of that, be sure they're well versed in critical thinking and skepticism. Comparative religion would be an immeasurable addition as well. Atheism isn't so much important as gaining an understanding of religious belief. I don't have children of myself, but I'm sure their social interactions will work themselves out. Religious belief hardly ever comes up between children. Kids are more interested in being kids than having philosophical debates. Try joining an atheist community, there's usually at least one around somewhere. They may have a daycare program you can immerse your kids into.

[AceBoogie]

to OP

Firstly I want to say that I am NOT a parent and don't plan on ever having children, but I have had some ideas on this and have thought about what I would do if I ever do have children.

As others have said I would probably focus more on raising my child to be skeptical of all claims. There are, some things however, that are not really up for debate. You can be skeptical of all claims but that doesn't change how old the Earth is, or how babies are born or how grass grows. I would teach my child the facts as I know them and would teach them that, when confronted with topics concerning god(s) and/or religions, always ask tough questions. I would teach them the difference between faith and knowledge.

It seems like it would be a very difficult thing to navigate as a parent but I suppose the best thing you can do is be consistent about it. Don't falter or change your ideas from moment to moment and give your child a solid, HONEST foundation to work from. I always said to myself if my child became a Satanist, so be it. If they become a devout Catholic, that's cool too. As long as whatever they do makes them happy, doesn't harm them and doesn't make them feel any sort of internal conflict, so be it.

But, let's be honest, what rational, skeptical human being would buy into the bullshit they wrote in the bible?