time for you to become a Muslim. accept it

[Minimalist]

[The Valkyrie]

Two conversions?

Can you show who?

I suspect one may already be a Muslim (Atlas), and the other taking the piss.

If Christians can't convert me, why do you think I'd convert to a religion in which I'd be a second or third class citizen?

[Minimalist]

[Wyrd of Gawd]

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i too want to thank those who called me names. thanks for taking the time and  trouble . May Miss Allah grant you the  camel of your dreams. May you enjoy the bumpy ride .. i promise

i got two conversions so far . it that said wall of text and I'm Christian that will be ran out of place . And it that said holy message and posted the verse.

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the bit i mentioned  about the quran becoming a man on resurrection day is in the haddith .the two suras , one becoming a cloud and the other a shade in the haddith too .

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back to the verse . I asked Allah for permission to wipe my ass today . no response , so i just went ahead and wiped it with Allah’s blessings . sadly the flatulence happened before i had a chance to ask for permission.I expect though Allah gave his permission to my wind

Allah can't give permission even if he wanted to  because the dummy abrogated himself .

okay i engaged you as far as your silly verse is concerned . c'mon bring it on .

do you want to know why none the 99 names of allah is love ? because the dummy went all over the quran saying he doesn't love this and that and when you add up the shit you end up with the whole planet .he hates people .there  , now you know why . i'll post the verrse when i feel like it . i mean to corroborate

As a devout Muslim i demand that Allah step down and let someone qualified run the show . I nominate Mickey Mouse.

yes do your research . but remember a lot of good work was done already. All you have to do is reference it ,  specially by ex Muslims and Arabic Christians . they have an advantage over you western academician . he has to hold back. The academic world is delicate

archeological diggings have yielded exciting shit . sadly some are being systematically destroyed to cover up  for islam --diggings in Arabia

i see a catholic showed up. reminds of something . The Vatican has load of shit in their archives but they are not going to yield those secrets .I expect they calculate that destroying islam can lead to shit like rational materialism ( Hitler) or soviet union era shit l like there are no invalid comrade citizens in the soviet union and that you outlived your purpose if you get too old or too sick to work

if there is going to be a future mythology that is  in the making it has to incorporate elements  from Christianity . atheism needs to shape itself and create the right sort of atheist . else it will end up with the same chaos that plagues islam and caused it to be a failure .

and let me end by  saying  we the lofty Arabs are going to grab all the blonde women as booty . they are ours . we taking them from you. I advice you if you’re blond with blue eyes to hand over your sisters or else .don’t make me angry . you won’t like me when I’m angry

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Thanks for the load of information.

Can you please provide the specific hadith about the koran becoming a man on resurrection day?  

I hope you will continue to shed light on Islamic beliefs but I'm sensing that the deities are growing increasing upset at you and may banish you to hell-fire.

[The Valkyrie]

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i too want to thank those who called me names. thanks for taking the time and  trouble . May Miss Allah grant you the  camel of your dreams. May you enjoy the bumpy ride .. i promise

i got two conversions so far . it that said wall of text and I'm Christian that will be ran out of place . And it that said holy message and posted the verse.

---

---

back to the verse . I asked Allah for permission to wipe my ass today . no response , so i just went ahead and wiped it with Allah’s blessings . sadly the flatulence happened before i had a chance to ask for permission.I expect though Allah gave his permission to my wind

Allah can't give permission even if he wanted to  because the dummy abrogated himself .

okay i engaged you as far as your silly verse is concerned . c'mon bring it on .

do you want to know why none the 99 names of allah is love ? because the dummy went all over the quran saying he doesn't love this and that and when you add up the shit you end up with the whole planet .he hates people .there  , now you know why . i'll post the verrse when i feel like it . i mean to corroborate

As a devout Muslim i demand that Allah step down and let someone qualified run the show . I nominate Mickey Mouse.

yes do your research . but remember a lot of good work was done already. All you have to do is reference it ,  specially by ex Muslims and Arabic Christians . they have an advantage over you western academician . he has to hold back. The academic world is delicate

archeological diggings have yielded exciting shit . sadly some are being systematically destroyed to cover up  for islam --diggings in Arabia

i see a catholic showed up. reminds of something . The Vatican has load of shit in their archives but they are not going to yield those secrets .I expect they calculate that destroying islam can lead to shit like rational materialism ( Hitler) or soviet union era shit l like there are no invalid comrade citizens in the soviet union and that you outlived your purpose if you get too old or too sick to work

if there is going to be a future mythology that is  in the making it has to incorporate elements  from Christianity . atheism needs to shape itself and create the right sort of atheist . else it will end up with the same chaos that plagues islam and caused it to be a failure .

and let me end by  saying  we the lofty Arabs are going to grab all the blonde women as booty . they are ours . we taking them from you. I advice you if you’re blond with blue eyes to hand over your sisters or else .don’t make me angry . you won’t like me when I’m angry

---

Thanks for the load of information.

Can you please provide the specific hadith about the koran becoming a man on resurrection day?  

I hope you will continue to shed light on Islamic beliefs but I'm sensing that the deities are growing increasing upset at you and may banish you to hell-fire.

Detroit??

Surely not even the god of the OT would be that mean!

[Gearbreak]

[pocaracas]

The amazing poetry that I've been missing by sticking to the mafia game thread and not looking out to the rest of the forum!


Always late to the party, but this guy seems to keep the party going!

As a devout Muslim i demand that Allah step down and let someone qualified run the show . I nominate Mickey Mouse.

You're so muslim, it hurts!

[Youwait]

the good news for you my beloved hell bound atheists I have four six packs of beer and a couple of joints and i feel empowered by piety and blessed right now after having just finished reciting surat Al Tongue with my blond and blue eyed slave woman as she sat on my face as i darted my tongue back and forth and thisa way and thata way . . She is happy and satisfied and is dozing off. “ If Allah made anything better than pussy he must have kept it for himself .”. That’s basically surat Al Tongue . Gabriel e mailed it to me from high above . Say , I testify there is but one pussy maker and youwait is his prophet .

Lets chat .say surat Al Tongue two times first though. .

the haddith is in : 1) Mustadrak al Sahihain akhbar fi fadail al quran joomla, 2) Sahih Muslim, Kitab salat al musafirin bab fadel qirat al quran surat al baqarah 3) Musnad al imam ahmed

this off the top of my head. I don’t have the books. But the shit is there in those three.

it falls under what is historically referred to in the Islamic narrative as " The ordeal of the creation of the quran " the question to be answered, with dire consequences such as your head getting separated from your torso if you answered wrong, is : " Is the Quran created or uncreated " . if you answered uncreated your head stayed during the reign of three caliphs if i recall correctly . During the reign of the rest of the other caliphs your head came off if you answered created . this is excluding shiite .

the translation I pointed out touches on that but in the context of translation and scope .an expansive and rigorous treatment is possible though because the translation cites the references. I'm writing from memory .

Another thing , watch out for the language . The actual question is :"Is the quran created or qadeem?" Qadeem means old . you can work with uncreated as your base translation for qadeem for now.

Qadeem figure out when islam is supposed to supplant Christianity . the quran is actually modeled in Islam to fit the Christian description of its Satan - the guy they call Lucifer , the devil . You supplant something with the opposite to it . That how they went about it . . so from a Christian perspective you can say the quran is the Word of Lucifer on the tablet in hell . Once the quran becomes flesh then you got Lucifer as a “person” in the technical philosophical sense of those times , like based on Hellenic shit. The quran becomes flesh and disputes with whom ? Jesus of the Christian of course . Christian word became flesh so Islam word gets to become flesh and all things being equal, the battle for heaven is not yet finished. so that’s how you grabble with Gaddeem ., .

The Vatican maintains allah is also the Christian god except Muslims are using the wrong instrument. Why I’m not sure rather not venture too much with catholic theologians. maybe conflict with the ten commandments.

Here something you might find in interesting. The Arab before IsIam when they circled the kaaba they chanted Allah has no partners except those partners whom he owns but do not own him. This makes sense if you believe in a god. Because you’re partner with god on those attributes such as love and mercy for example., in lesser degree of course but nonetheless a partner . so to say Allah has no partners is saying he is who ? Satan of course .

To me two religions can not co exit . a new mythology is needed . Atheists ? Atheists break rank on the battle field and they flee. Muslims today are more show than fight . Christians do not flee . Fierce on the battle field . if 'you're going to replace them you gonna need a soldier better than them. why is the need ? because war and mayhem is a condition of man .in this respect you gonna need me the original semite . i delight in the smell and taste of scorched burning metal , barbecued human flesh , rotten corpses . i know the smell of blood . i smell it in myself .

I'm the desert Aab . the real deal. those non arab Muslims’ are not . those are the slaves we dragged with our religion throughout the centuries .they are religion, I'm bigger . I'm culture . I am the culture . culture supersedes , and eclipses religion. I'm the Saracen that terrorized the lands and now have my slaves and minions doing the work albeit in very unsatisfactory way . I'm disgusted with them . disgrace. punks .

You also need to consider production . check capitulation buffer zones between the Ottomans and Christian Europe where Muslims and Christian lived along side each other but in different zones each under their respective jurisdiction. When the zones were disbanded the Christian zones were wealthier even though the resources were the same ...

One of the two main tenets of Christianity that gave it the advantage has to be incorporated in the future mythology . its that the world was created in a rational order . absent that and science will come to halt .

By contrast Islam at its height sought to rig up a world without causality. That was in the 15th century . like the verse it posted in this thread. It speaks to “what” Belief is rooted in Allah , in what . Ibn Rushed got in trouble trying to ascribe cotton burning to natural causes . Al Ghazzalie thugs said Allah burned the cotton and won the day and Averroes was made to stand at the mosque gate and every worshiper spat in his face . in the same century bishop Robert grosetteste was refining and defining the “scientific method “.

So between Christian “why” versus Muslims “what” . why , science. What , Allah.

Catholic doctrine stands on very solid philosophical grounds . hard to debunk them on this particular point . you can try but you won’t get far .

it posts a verse. it talks back to me . I who is its master. . you know there was a time when it was forbidden for non Arab Muslim to ride a horse and an Arab walks . he had to dismount and hand over his horse to the arab or his heads comes off .i tell you such is the treachery of times. it talks back to me . there a was a time when I took off it heads for no reason but for it existing . its existence is an affront to me . Back then we house our arab troops separately in garrisons so they don’t get contaminated. no contact with the roaches . you want to become a Muslim? sorrry no can do . in the beginning only arabs could . and this thing it talks to me about permission. allah is god to it not me . I'm the god of allah .

the verse has nothing to do with permission. this has nothing to do with permission . its culture . you come to me and you want to borrow my camle. I tell you do not have my permission , be reasonable. I offer you something , lets say a blond and blue eyed damsel . you say to me take the fucking camel .

allah doesn't give his permission means I go rob a caravan and kidnap me a few blond blue eyed sweethearts and after i ravish them i take them and give them to Qathem the greedy sob and Qathem says Allah gives you his permission. you can become a Muslim and join the gang .

but look if i am bad ass and qathem is scared of me , then I’m what they call in the Islamic narrative Mo'alaf . those are the arabs qathem paid off to become Muslims and stay Muslims. . pay me qathem and i’ be Muslim and not take off your head . .you better pay up Allah or i take off your head . . cheap ass deity.

And qathem was scared shitless of the desert arab . he knew we would sneak in at nite and take off his stupid head and disappear in the vast desert if he didn't pay . so he bad mouthed us, desert arab this and desert arab that .don't ever trust them and shit .but he didn't open his big mouth when we walked into the tent . the rest of crab had to shut up and not ask question. but not the desert arab. we walked in and said what the fuck we want to say and pussy sat there quiet and didn't say shit . .

Abu Sufain . After his son Yazzid butchered Qathems's family he turned around and said :" Hasim has played with the Mul'k . No knowledge came or inspiration was bestwoed " . the two tribes of yathrib screwed with the legacy to get over . that’s all.

one time the two tribes put out a call so we all assembled from the desert and whatever and we did the job kill everything that walks and crawls and took the pretty women and what not . then qathem the theif tries to cheat. he almost got dead that time. we grabbed him by his throat till his eyes popped out and he started begging like a sissy . punk split shit right after that .

the verse is how we talk. who we are . its how we do business . the author of the translation refers to it as keys . he is been diplomatic . he is an academician . he has to wtach out for himslef . but such keys are rife in the quran to be keys . in surat al baqara , it says outlandish shit and then turns aroud and says you know the truth or something to the effect to ponder what was just said before you unsheathe your swords and take off my head.so that is how you look at the verse. Allah doesn’t give permission not untill u pay the shit head .that’s it ends with reason. Reason it . i you reason it then what do get nurture. It mostly nurture. U nurture the child from early on to be asshole for exmple. plenty such keys in quran .
.
we sit in the tent and we bargain. we say a whole lot of shit and make all kind of bullshit claims but then we say but you know whats up . today the shit has gone over the heads of the its of today world . they think shit is for real .

and then it says heavy accent talking about me . it talks as such about me , I, who gave it a religion , who gave it an identity . I ask you how would you feel if you were in my place ? but I'm patient despite the treachery of times and it is dear to me that no grief be seen in me lest a cockroach gloats .

I’m saying culture has to be factored in. And I’m trying to keep it light . not go too deep
Don’t forget to pray now surat the tongue

[Minimalist]

I have four six packs of beer and a couple of joints and i feel empowered by piety

Throw in bacon or its no deal.

[brewer]

Any points/jokes you're trying to make are getting lost in the wall of text. If you want to keep our attention (at least mine), brevity is your best friend. 

Can you ship camels?