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The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
#1
The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
I can't for the life of me understand why so many people are consenting to respond to a Statler Waldorf thread that has been posted under the "Science and Mathematics" topic. Statler Waldorf hasn't got anything to do with science. Science and Statler Waldorf should not be brought into close proximity to each other - the combination is a public health hazard since it is bound to lead to a rapid increase in stress levels. The obvious antidote to this is to move anything to do with Statler Waldorf to the Religion topic where it belongs, therefore any exchange can be appropriately relaxed.

Anyway, I thought I'd post the conversation below here in an open thread because I finally got PM'd an answer last night about my questions in the "How Old is the Earth?" thread. Statler Waldorf has kindly agreed to let me copy and paste the reply publicly. The bold paragraphs are my questions, the rest are Statler Waldorf's answers. The exchange is polite and I'd rather it stayed that way. I have been sitting reading my screen quietly, open-mouthed at the contortions necessary to fit scientific explanations into the 6,000-year old Earth theory. I'd be really grateful for some retorts to Statler Waldorf's responses, I find the whole debate exhausting.

Infact, although I think Statler Waldorf should be preserved for posterity, I do think there is a serious point in these conversations, since we all know that it doesn't matter how much evidence is produced, and how much proof of the 4.5 billion year old earth there is, some creationists will always, to their dying breath, choose to contradict the many valid proofs that there are. What does this say about the value of objective truth?

Here goes...

[Existentialist]
I haven't quite followed what the explanations are for fossils appearing in the right rock layers according to multi-million year timescales, how plate tectonics is explainable in a 6,000 year timeframe, how ice cores seem to show a record of nearly a million years rather than 6,000 years, why there was a 2-second delay in radio communications with the moon explorers if electromagnetic radiation is supposed to be instantaneous, and how evolution itself was supposed to happen in 6,000 years (maybe it isn't, maybe that's the point).

[Statler Waldorf]
Well as far as fossils go. If a global flood did occur the fossil record is exactly what we would expect to find. Creation research has shown that an event like this can cause accerlated radio-metric decay, so the fossils buried earlest would under go this accerlated effect longer than the animals buried later. So we would expect the animals towards the bottom of the fossil column to radio-metrically date to be older than the ones higher up which they do.

Evolutionists claim that the fossil record moves from simple to complex as you move up, this is actually inaccurate. "Simpleness" is an arbratrary measurement and a lot of animals are thought to be simpler just because of their placing in the record like reptiles vs. birds. Are reptiles really more simple than birds? Not really. Another problem with this view is that many of the animals that appear to be morphologically simple are actually genetrically complex. Some species of amoebas have been found to have just as much DNA as humans.

Rather the fossil record is best explained by mobility and intelligence. The less intelligent and less mobile animals would be buried first. We see this. The more mobile but less intelligent animals would be next, small mammels and dinosaurs. We would expect that very few intelligent and mobile creatures would even be fossilized because they woudl excape the initial sediment flows and their bodies would then float to the surface and never be fossilized (i.e. humans and greater apes). Almost all cases of fossilizatoin indicate a quick and surprising buriel. A dinosaur fossil was actually recently discovered that was in the process of giving birth. The dinosaur tracks we find all appear to be fleeing something. All of this would indicate a global catastrophe.

As for plate tectonics. There are two branches of thought on this subject in the Creationist camp. One group actually does not believe in true plate tectonics and continental drift (whcih there are secular scientists who deny it as well). They believe all the animals would have been wiped out on these continents and then they would have just been re-populated by animals using ice bridges during the Ice Age. The second group believes in catestrophic plate techtonics. There is a computer model built that shows how the runaway subduction of negatively buoyant ocean lithosphere into the Earth’s mantle could happen in a very short period of time due to the flood. I tend to lean towards this second group because it solves the "not enough water" problem and helps to also explain the animals we see on different continents.

As for ice cores, what is actually observed in ice cores is a very clear history for the last few thousand years. However, once you get past that point the ice starts to lose it's obvious layers and appears all "squished" together. So secular scientists just assume the annual accumulation thicknesses still apply and keep on counting the years through this portion of the ice. The creation looks at this and believes the majority of the ice prior to a few thousand years was deposited rather quickly and that would account for the apparent absence of "annual" layers. Again, it's two difference interpretations for the same observation.

Creationists beleive a lot of rapid speciation has occured in the last 6,000 years (hence why 30 million different species of animals did not need to be taken onto the Ark), but not the entire evolutionary model that involves common descent.

[Existentialist]
First, I don't see why god would bother, when he made all the stars appear an Day 4, to make it look to us as if they had all been created as part of a multi-billion year timeframe. The timelines for stellar development over billions of years seem consistent with observation, they don't need to be the same star. If you were presented with examples of 80 human males each in a different year of life, you could easily model the typical development of one human male. Same with stars, surely.

[Statler Waldorf]
Like many things, there are different models to explain this too. I actually just watched a DVD on the Starlight and Time problem a couple weeks ago and although I for the most part understood it, it did leave me a bit confused because astrophysics is not my field. One model can explain the history of the Universe using how time is effected by gravity and using gravitational wells to explain how 6000 years could elapse from Earth's perspective but 20 billion elapse elsewhere in the universe. Another model uses how time is believed to behave inside a black hole to explain this same thing. The third model (which I like because it's cleaner) explains how the account in the Bible is written from an observational definition of time. So god could have created distant stars long before day 4 (by calculated time standards) but the light would have al reached Earth on day 4 and been recorded correctly as doing so.

As to the question, "why would God be sneaky about all of this?", I do not believe He has been. If I tell someone in Portland, Oregon, "I just got here from Las Vegas." They might say,

"Oh so you left Las Vegas 15 hours ago because that's how long it takes to drive from Vegas to Portland right?"

Then I would say, "Well I never said I drove, I actually flew two hours from Vegas to San fran, had an hour lay over, and then flew two hours from San Fran to Portland, so it only took me 5 hours".
The first person would not turn around and say, "You are being deceiful because it looks to me like it should have taken you 15 hours". No, they would most likely say, "Oh I am sorry, I just incorrectly assumed you drove".

So when God tells us that a global flood occured and that the Earth is young, then we turn around and assume one did not occur and use these assumptions to conclude the Earth is old, I do not believe it is God who is deceiving us. We are just not using proper assumptions. Does that make any sense at all? That was the best example I could come up with off the top of my head.

[Existentialist]
But more importantly if, as we both agree, interpreting any evidence involves an act of faith, because however many spreadsheets we create, we still have to interpret what is there and make our own minds up and trust our judgement; if that is the case then why does the Bible need to be read literally at all - you could conclude that everything in it is intended to be metaphorical, still beautiful stories but not literally true, even the virgin birth, because you can still interpret the metaphor and everything else you see in front of you as being evidence of God's existence. Why the need to have much concrete evidence to support the young earth theory? A tiny amount of evidence could be interpreted correctly, a large amount of evidence could be interpreted incorrectly - so why the need to keep pointing to a mass of evidence and attacking the evidence of rationalistic atheists?

[Statler Waldorf]
Well when I say I take scripture literally I am using the original definition of "literal". This word has kind of taken on a new definition but it was originally intended to mean that you interpret something according to the literary style it was written in. So if it is a poem, you read it has a poem, if it is a metaphor you interpret it as a metaphor. The original Hebrew makes it very clear that the stories in the Old Testament of the Bible were written as actual history so I interpret them that way. I feel that certain events in the Bible need to be interpreted as real events because of their Theological significance. The Bible makes way more sense when you do this. An example would be the virgin birth. This is described as a super-natural event- so the fact that virgins do not naturally give birth does not disprove the Biblical claim since the Bible never claimed it happend naturally. If it did claim this, then I would take some issue to the accuracy of scripture. However, the Virgin Birth is important because it ensures that Christ was born without original sin and He could live a perfect life and also then be a true atonement for the sins of His people. So interpreting the virgin birth as an actual event is very important to the whole of Christianity.
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#2
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
Well, that proves that. What a certifiable loon.
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#3
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
I can't stand him. He has 'Troll' written all over him. It's times like these that I just wanna leave for a bit and hope that when I come back, he'll already be banned.
Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence - Carl Sagan

Mankind's intelligence walks hand in hand with it's stupidity.

Being an atheist says nothing about your overall intelligence, it just means you don't believe in god. Atheists can be as bright as any scientist and as stupid as any creationist.

You never really know just how stupid someone is, until you've argued with them.
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#4
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
(October 20, 2010 at 7:49 pm)Ace Wrote: I can't stand him. He has 'Troll' written all over him. It's times like these that I just wanna leave for a bit and hope that when I come back, he'll already be banned.


Be more proactive. Drive him out.
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#5
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
(October 20, 2010 at 7:51 pm)Chuck Wrote:
(October 20, 2010 at 7:49 pm)Ace Wrote: I can't stand him. He has 'Troll' written all over him. It's times like these that I just wanna leave for a bit and hope that when I come back, he'll already be banned.

Be more proactive. Drive him out.

How? He does nothing but troll and annoy. All I can do is add him to my ignore list, which makes his posts vanish.
Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence - Carl Sagan

Mankind's intelligence walks hand in hand with it's stupidity.

Being an atheist says nothing about your overall intelligence, it just means you don't believe in god. Atheists can be as bright as any scientist and as stupid as any creationist.

You never really know just how stupid someone is, until you've argued with them.
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#6
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
Quote:Well as far as fossils go. If a global flood did occur the fossil record is exactly what we would expect to find.


It's really very simple, Ex. He does not know what the fuck he is talking about.
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#7
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
(October 20, 2010 at 7:57 pm)Ace Wrote: How? He does nothing but troll and annoy. All I can do is add him to my ignore list, which makes his posts vanish.

I've been arguing with him as much as anyone and he doesn't seem to be here for any reason other than the reasons we're here. He's certifiably wrong but he's broken none of the forum rules to my knowledge despite the aggressiveness of the atheists and scientists debating him.
So I'm inclined to think he's not a troll any more than any of us are, despite believing in things that defy all common and sensible empirical knowledge.

I see no reason to try to drive him out or force him to do anything until he starts breaking rules.
He's certainly been more amiable than previous nutjobs that have trolled here before so other than believing in crazy, nutty things I don't believe it would look good to kick him out for believing in crazy ideas.
If today you can take a thing like evolution and make it a crime to teach in the public schools, tomorrow you can make it a crime to teach it in the private schools and next year you can make it a crime to teach it to the hustings or in the church. At the next session you may ban books and the newspapers...
Ignorance and fanaticism are ever busy and need feeding. Always feeding and gloating for more. Today it is the public school teachers; tomorrow the private. The next day the preachers and the lecturers, the magazines, the books, the newspapers. After a while, Your Honor, it is the setting of man against man and creed against creed until with flying banners and beating drums we are marching backward to the glorious ages of the sixteenth centry when bigots lighted fagots to burn the men who dared to bring any intelligence and enlightenment and culture to the human mind. ~Clarence Darrow, at the Scopes Monkey Trial, 1925

Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. ~Ronald Reagan
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#8
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
Quote:Well as far as fossils go. If a global flood did occur the fossil record is exactly what we would expect to find.

Supposedly, Statler is working on an M.A. in geoscience. I would love to have the name of Statler's student advisor so I could send him a copy of this post. Anyone who ignores the millions of pages of stratigraphic columns in the published literature in such a blatant way doesn't deserve any type of degree, much less a degree in geoscience.

First of all, creationists make the claim that all of the sedimentary rocks (whether or not they contain fossils) were all laid down at the same time by a global flood during the time of Noah, several thousand years ago. Ok, let's play along and see where this leads us. In order to show that all of the sedimentary rocks the world over were laid down by a global flood, those rocks must, by definition, contain structural evidence of a dramatic flood, the most obvious being a completely random orientation of sedimentary grains. This would be required by the fact that such a massive global flood would be characterized by turbulent flow. This turbulent flow would first show itself in the rock record in the form of massive scouring of underlying rock, and so leave a global unconformatiy. And this massive scouring would, by definition mix underlying rock of every particle size and deposit it all over the globe as a kind of mishmash conglomerate containing everything from micron sized particles to slabs the size of sky scrapers above this global unconformity (a sort of super mega-tempestite). You would also find evidence of massive ripple marks left in these deposits by the flowing water. Not sure how massive they would be, but I think it is safe to say that they would be visible from outer space and would be found at the same age on every continent. What you would not find it graded bedding, undisturbed bone beds, hardground, obvious facies relationships showing deposition in different energy environments, transgression and regression relationships in regional sedimentary structures, tens of thousands of feet of undisturbed marine and terrestrial sediments, aolian sediments, undisturbed deltaic sediments, and all the diversity of sedimentary rock features and types we find all over the world today.

Here is a typical stratigraphic column for sedimentary rock you could find pretty much anywhere in the world today.

[Image: fig002.gif]

Clearly, there is nothing in this, or any other stratigraphic column that would indicate a global flood ever occurred. There is no global ultra-mega-super-tempestite in existence, and certainly no global unconfiormity.
Quote:Are reptiles really more simple than birds? Not really.

Is a worm more simple structurally and genetically than a fish? Yes. Is a fish more simple structurally and genetically than a cow? Yes. Next.
Quote:Some species of amoebas have been found to have just as much DNA as humans.

This is actually proof of evolution, dude. Genomes include junk DNA. The older the species the more time it's genome has had to accumulate junk. Amoeba have been around longer than mammals. It certainly isn't proof that "god did it".
Quote:Rather the fossil record is best explained by mobility and intelligence. The less intelligent and less mobile animals would be buried first.

Of course, he would never dare to say this in his geoscience masters thesis. He would get laughed right out of the school. And that's because it its the most laughable argument I've ever heard. Here is a slab of ordovician age limestone containing "less intelligent", and less mobile molluscs right along side "more intelligent, and certainly more mobile orthocone cephalopods:

[Image: FossilShellPlaque.jpg]
And on and on, the absurdity continues.
'The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and seal. It could not be expressed better.'
-- Samuel "Mark Twain" Clemens

"I think that in the discussion of natural problems we ought to begin not with the scriptures, but with experiments, demonstrations, and observations".

- Galileo Galilei (1564-1642)

"In short, Meyer has shown that his first disastrous book was not a fluke: he is capable of going into any field in which he has no training or research experience and botching it just as badly as he did molecular biology. As I've written before, if you are a complete amateur and don't understand a subject, don't demonstrate the Dunning-Kruger effect by writing a book about it and proving your ignorance to everyone else! "

- Dr. Donald Prothero
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#9
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
Quote:Rather the fossil record is best explained by mobility and intelligence. The less intelligent and less mobile animals would be buried first. We see this. The more mobile but less intelligent animals would be next, small mammels and dinosaurs. We would expect that very few intelligent and mobile creatures would even be fossilized because they woudl excape the initial sediment flows and their bodies would then float to the surface and never be fossilized (i.e. humans and greater apes).

If this is the case how is it that Ichthyosaurs, Plesiosaurs and Mosasaurs drowned before people and other land animals even though they were perfectly adapted to live in the ocean.

P.s whilst checking the spellings of the reptiles for this post I found that there is a dinosaur called a Qantassaurus, ROFLOL
[Image: mybannerglitter06eee094.gif]
If you're not supposed to ride faster than your guardian angel can fly then mine had better get a bloody SR-71.
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#10
RE: The Statler Waldorf Recovery Room
This video (yes, it's YouTube...bite me SW) dispels some of the myths used by creationists to "prove" the flood happened. I very much like the experiment done to show that mixtures of different sediments do not create layers (as the creationists claim).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5ElhX38w3Q
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