Hey Everyone! It's Jonah!

[Jonah]

Hey everyone!

Since I’m new to these forums, I thought I’d take a moment to introduce myself. I’m a 17 year old guy living in a tiny town in the middle of the Alabama Bible Belt. I have lived in big cities from the East Coast to the West Coast my entire life, and definitely say that I never want to live in a small Baptist-run town again! Currently, I’m a senior in high school, and I can’t wait to graduate (I really hope I get a scholarship!).

While my real name is not Jonah, there is a significance behind my user name. For the first 8 years of my life, I was always in church. One of the first times I questioned my faith in Christianity was when I heard the story of Jonah in Sunday school when I was 8 years old. I had just learned about the digestive system in my science class, and remember wondering how Jonah did not get digested after being in the stomach of the whale/big fish/giant sea creature for 3 days. Right around my 9th birthday, I moved to a new city, and my parents did not take me to church for the next 3 years; it was during this time I learned about evolution and lost my “active” faith.

I never really considered myself an atheist until about December of last year. It was around this time I found AtheistForums. After reading some of the posts, I became enlightened to atheism and how well it correlated with my own beliefs. Because I know how well this forum helped me, I’m looking forward to being an active member in the community.

I didn’t mean to write a book, but I just had to say what I needed to say (yes, I am making a John Mayer reference!). XD

[Tiberius]

Welcome to the forums Jonah! I'm glad to hear this forum helped you to come to your position on atheism; hopefully we can help you expand on it, and teach you how to debate theists whilst we're at it

[Jonah]

Welcome to the forums Jonah! I'm glad to hear this forum helped you to come to your position on atheism; hopefully we can help you expand on it, and teach you how to debate theists whilst we're at it

Why, thank you kind sir! Considering the fact that my parents still make me go to church, I could really use some help on debating theists!

[Cego_Colher]

Hello Jonah!

[Jonah]

Hello Jonah!

'ello!

[Minimalist]

and remember wondering how Jonah did not get digested after being in the stomach of the whale/big fish/giant sea creature for 3 days.

I'll bet they told you it was another one of those fucking miracles.

They trot out "miracle" as an excuse when their bible is too absurd even for them.

Welcome, son. Enjoy your stay.

[Oldandeasilyconfused]

G'day Jonah, and welcome from sunny Adelaide, South Australia, city of churches and bizarre murder capital of my great nation. (really)

[Jonah]

and remember wondering how Jonah did not get digested after being in the stomach of the whale/big fish/giant sea creature for 3 days.

I'll bet they told you it was another one of those fucking miracles.

They trot out "miracle" as an excuse when their bible is too absurd even for them.

Welcome, son. Enjoy your stay.

Many thanks for the warm welcome!

You're right about the whole "miracle" thing. My Sunday school teacher always loved telling that story to teach us that, "No matter what, God will always love you, even if you disobey Him." Needless to say, I was confused about the whole thing and a little freaked out. Perhaps I can attribute my first steps toward atheism to this nutty Sunday school teacher?

[Minimalist]

My first realization that these people were jerks was a nun teaching Sunday school. Funny. They are their own worst enemy.

[Jonah]

My first realization that these people were jerks was a nun teaching Sunday school. Funny. They are their own worst enemy.

Fortunately, I have never had to experience evil nuns. However, I have had my fair share of stupid Methodist/Presbyterian Sunday school teachers (including my crazy youth director whose weekly diatribes I'm forced to listen to each Wednesday and Sunday night).

I'm forced to go to church by my parents who believe that I'm anti-God (in a way, I guess I am). This belief stems from a few questions I asked my dad about the recent Pew Research study regarding the ignorance of American Christians of their own religion. Even though I calmly asked him what I assumed were fair questions regarding his opinion about this study, he was furious, saying, "Well, which is harder? Believing in something or believing in nothing?" with the obvious correct answer being "believing in something." I felt compelled to argue the psychology of abandoning a cult mentality, but he didn't look too pleased with me at that moment, so I dropped the subject.

Despite my parents' attempts to "re-convert" me, I feel compelled to express and explore my atheistic beliefs. Instead of whining about my Sunday school teachers and my preacher, I think I'm going to start a blog documenting all of the ridiculous things they teach at church. I'm not sure yet when I'll start this blog as I'm working on the college application process at the moment. In the meantime, expect a ton of posts from me about the crap my preacher says!