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Current time: March 28, 2024, 5:51 pm

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I was so poor as a kid routine
#1
I was so poor as a kid routine
I was so poor that instead of playdoh I used fresh turds. I used to make toy soldiers, Spider-Man, Batman, Superman all out of shit that were my only toys. One day our neighbors septic tank overflowed and it was our Comic Con.

We didn't have money to go on a waterside but waited until dad collapsed from drunkenness and then slided down his sweaty back.

I didn't even have a room instead, at night, my 20 brothers and sisters would get around me forming a wall and arch their hands forming a roof so I could sleep for 10 minutes and then I would stand so that someone else would sleep. We would all take turns in sleeping and standing for each other.

We didn't have c-section instead half of the kids would grab left labia while other half of kids would grab the right one and we would pull for hours until the baby came out.

We didn't have money to waste on toothpaste and toothbrush, instead we would chew live coal or gurgle molten steal.

We certainly didn't have money for some fancy schmancy air conditioning, instead every time someone needed to fart he or she would walk to your face and do it and it was very refreshing, although you would frequently get more than just a wind in your cheek considering that most of the people didn't have money for underwear to filtrate hard parts.
teachings of the Bible are so muddled and self-contradictory that it was possible for Christians to happily burn heretics alive for five long centuries. It was even possible for the most venerated patriarchs of the Church, like St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas, to conclude that heretics should be tortured (Augustine) or killed outright (Aquinas). Martin Luther and John Calvin advocated the wholesale murder of heretics, apostates, Jews, and witches. - Sam Harris, "Letter To A Christian Nation"
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#2
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
You had turds??  Posh fucker.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#3
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine


I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#4
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
We didn't have shoes. We wrapped our feet in barbed wire for traction and protection from the elements.
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#5
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
And had to walk a mile up hill to school, both ways.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#6
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
We were so poor, we ate air meals.
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#7
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
Nothing better than an air sandwich made with the airiest bread.
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#8
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
"So, you had a dishwasher..."
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#9
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
Ethiopian kids used to come round and laugh at us.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#10
RE: I was so poor as a kid routine
We were so poor we went to KFC and licked other peoples fingers.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!






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