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Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
#1
Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
Another great example of the Lord being two places at once! 

Mark 1:9-13

Quote:And it came to pass in those days, that Jesus came from Nazareth of Galilee, and was baptized of John in Jordan.
...And immediately the spirit driveth him into the wilderness. And he was there in the wilderness forty days, tempted of Satan; and was with the wild beasts; and the angels ministered unto him.



"Immediately" after the baptism, Jesus goes into the wilderness for 40 days. 


John 1:29 to 2:2

Quote:The next day John seeth Jesus coming unto him, and saith, Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world...
Again the next day after John stood, and two of his disciples;...
The day following Jesus would go forth into Galilee, and findeth Philip, and saith unto him, Follow me...
And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: And both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage.

Day 1: Baptism (sort of)
Day 2: Gather disciples.
Day 3: Attend wedding and make wine. 

All while spending 40 days in the Wilderness.

He's everywhere.

Checkmate, atheists.
"You don't need facts when you got Jesus." -Pastor Deacon Fred, Landover Baptist Church

™: True Christian is a Trademark of the Landover Baptist Church. I have no affiliation with this fine group of True Christians ™ because I can't afford their tithing requirements but would like to be. Maybe someday the Lord will bless me with enough riches that I am able to. 

And for the lovers of Poe, here's your winking smiley:  Wink
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#2
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
Wrong again. The Gospel Of John only indirectly mentions the baptism of Jesus by John the Baptist. John and Mark are describing two different sequences of events.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#3
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
You left out "immediately."

"John" is a total re-write of the first story.  In "john" jesus is no longer the strong silent type.  He's fucking Chatty Cathy!
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#4
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
'Immediately' what?

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#5
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
Quote:And immediately the spirit driveth him into the wilderness.

He either "immediately" went to the wilderness or he didn't.
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#6
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
But that's just it - M and L are relating different timelines about different events. No where does it say of imply that the events related in John immediately follow the events related in Matthew. A way to iron them out would be:

-Jesus meets JTB and is baptized.  He immediately goes into the wilderness.

-A month and a half later, while JTB is telling his acolytes about the baptism, Jesus shows up and John says, 'Look, everybody - that's the guy!!'

-Jesus wanders about for a few verses and ends up at a wedding.

There are lots of conflicts in the Bible, but this isn't one of them.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#7
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
(November 27, 2018 at 7:38 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: But that's just it - M and L are relating different timelines about different events. No where does it say of imply that the events related in John immediately follow the events related in Matthew. A way to iron them out would be:

-Jesus meets JTB and is baptized.  He immediately goes into the wilderness.

-A month and a half later, while JTB is telling his acolytes about the baptism, Jesus shows up and John says, 'Look, everybody - that's the guy!!'

-Jesus wanders about for a few verses and ends up at a wedding.

There are lots of conflicts in the Bible, but this isn't one of them.

Boru

[Out of Character]

OK, that's a good apologetic, I admit. Of course, the real reason is John simply did away with the baptism completely. You notice, as the story grew, JtB took on a more subservient role. 

Mark: He baptizes Jesus then gets out of the way for JC's ministry. 
Matt: He baptizes Jesus after first saying he's unworthy to do so (indeed, why does JC need a baptism at all?)
John: He just acknowledges Jesus. 

Note also how John's Jesus not only had no need to wait for JtB to exit stage left before getting started in his ministry, Jesus opened a rival baptism business and beat John at his own game! 

The story got grander with the telling.
"You don't need facts when you got Jesus." -Pastor Deacon Fred, Landover Baptist Church

™: True Christian is a Trademark of the Landover Baptist Church. I have no affiliation with this fine group of True Christians ™ because I can't afford their tithing requirements but would like to be. Maybe someday the Lord will bless me with enough riches that I am able to. 

And for the lovers of Poe, here's your winking smiley:  Wink
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#8
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
How can you have "baptism....sort of?"  Either you tried to drown the fuck or you didn't!
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#9
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
(November 27, 2018 at 7:46 pm)Minimalist Wrote: How can you have "baptism....sort of?"  Either you tried to drown the fuck or you didn't!

John's Jesus is never baptized by JtB. 

By that point in the story development, JtB was so unworthy that he never does anything except talk about how great Jesus is.
"You don't need facts when you got Jesus." -Pastor Deacon Fred, Landover Baptist Church

™: True Christian is a Trademark of the Landover Baptist Church. I have no affiliation with this fine group of True Christians ™ because I can't afford their tithing requirements but would like to be. Maybe someday the Lord will bless me with enough riches that I am able to. 

And for the lovers of Poe, here's your winking smiley:  Wink
Reply
#10
RE: Jesus Attended a Wedding While Also in the Wilderness
Quote:Jesus Attended a Wedding

Did he try to fuck one of the bridesmaids?


Or one of the ushers?

(November 27, 2018 at 7:53 pm)YahwehIsTheWay Wrote:
(November 27, 2018 at 7:46 pm)Minimalist Wrote: How can you have "baptism....sort of?"  Either you tried to drown the fuck or you didn't!

John's Jesus is never baptized by JtB. 

By that point in the story development, JtB was so unworthy that he never does anything except talk about how great Jesus is.

Splitting hairs...


Quote:29 The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, “Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world! 30 This is the one I meant when I said, ‘A man who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’ 31 I myself did not know him, but the reason I came baptizing with water was that he might be revealed to Israel.”

32 Then John gave this testimony: “I saw the Spirit come down from heaven as a dove and remain on him. 33 And I myself did not know him, but the one who sent me to baptize with water told me, ‘The man on whom you see the Spirit come down and remain is the one who will baptize with the Holy Spirit.’

Get a load of this apologetic asswipe trying to reconcile the 4 bullshit stories.

https://hermeneutics.stackexchange.com/q...t-of-the-s

Quote:In the synoptic gospels, the Holy Spirit is given as Jesus comes up out of the water (Mark 1:10, Luke 3:21,22, Matt. 3:16,17), but John, in John 1:29, recognizes Jesus, then later says in John 1:33, "I didn't know Him, but He who sent me to baptize with water told me, 'the One you see the Spirit descending and resting on - He is the One ...'

How can this be explained?

Quote:Frankly, I do not see any need to reconcile the four accounts. John's wording IS a little tricky, but the way I read 1:29-34 is as follows: 1) Jesus' baptism had already taken place; 2) John IDs Jesus as God's Lamb; 3) John identifies himself as the forerunner, and Jesus as the "royalty" whom he preceded; 4) John says twice that he did not recognize Jesus as the Messiah UNTIL His baptism; 5) John testifies that he HAS SEEN Jesus being anointed with the Holy Spirit at His baptism (see #1, above); 6) at the baptism is where John recognized Messiah Jesus bec. the HS descended & REMAINED on Him. – rhetorician Feb 20 '14 at 16:36

Clearly, this guy is now a trumptard.
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