"Laughing At Religion" Meme Thread

[Abaddon_ire]

At best it’s based on the Epic of Gilgamesh.

Either way, there was no global flood.

And no regional flood that could have been that large.

The only possibility is that the story is based on memories of the flooding of the Black sea, thousands of years earlier.

The Hebrew-Israelites were not based on the epic of Gilgamesh but what the Prophets of God revealed to them.

Nope. It is supposed to be a historical record of actual events. Or are you changing your claim so that it never actually happened? You cannot have it both ways much as you might try.

The Sumerians also descend from those who were saved from the flood. The Sumerian civilization formed after the flood. They are located near where Noah's ark prostrated and therefore the story prevailed mostly intact through oral and written transmission, while the rest of the cultures, separated by space-time and far from the ark, tell a similar story but with alteration produced by oral transmission.

Well then you must clarify when you think this flood happened and why.

A regional flood can be a global flood depending on the area where the event took place (Noah and his Ark).

Nope. A flood can be regional or a flood can be global. It cannot be both.

Not physically possible, never existed.

Unless you are going to claim a miracle.

And if miracles are possible, then anything is possible.

So I can claim that women have periods because they deserve that miracle. Fuck biology. Therefore they should be slaves because whatever I make up.

And that is all you can come up with.

Jesus H Spaghetti Monster. Why are you so threatened by empowered women? I am a red blooded male and I want women who step up and wont back down.

And Noahs ship? Feel free to explain how kangaroos made the trek to the ark and back from the Ark. And Koalas. And Duck Billed Platypuses. and well anything. That is what is meant by the claim that this superstitious explains nothing.

Noah did not pick up all the terrestrial animals on Earth but those around him. Those animals he collected were not many.

Then you are claiming a regional flood. Get your story straight.

[soldierofGod]

Again, let's visit the source materiel:

'They rose greatly on the earth, and all the high mountains under the entire heavens were covered. The waters rose and covered the mountains to a depth of more than fifteen cubits.'

Cubits come in several different lengths, but let's use the Hebrew short cubit (for reasons which should be obvious) of 17 1/2 inches.  This means that the Flood waters covered the top of Mount Everest to a depth of almost 22 feet.  You can work out for yourself (or look it up) the volume of water that would be required to do this.

Boru

As a Muslim I cannot rely on the Bible unless this agrees with the Qur'an because the Bible contains altered verses that later to highlight the exceptional fact. For example, in Genesis it is claimed that Noah's wife was saved from the Flood. However, the Qur'an says the opposite: Noah's wife was drowned by her hypocrisy. In this case, I do not believe what Genesis says about the woman of the Prophet but I rely on what the Quran says. Back to the topic.
The Flood is cited several times in the Qur'an, but there is no clear reference that the entire Earth was covered with water (including all the mountains).
Researchers have found evidence of numerous floods in different sectors of Iraq, some of which indicate intensive destruction. Of course, no one has discovered evidence of a flood capable of covering the entire earth's surface. This evidences what God says in the Quran about the "regional-universal" Flood.

[The Grand Nudger]

So, in your opinion...gods great big magical flood..was a river in iraq temporarily overrunning it's banks?

Some deluge, some god.

[The Valkyrie]

So...

“The re-write is better than the original so I’m going to believe in that!”?

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

Again, let's visit the source materiel:

'They rose greatly on the earth, and all the high mountains under the entire heavens were covered. The waters rose and covered the mountains to a depth of more than fifteen cubits.'

Cubits come in several different lengths, but let's use the Hebrew short cubit (for reasons which should be obvious) of 17 1/2 inches.  This means that the Flood waters covered the top of Mount Everest to a depth of almost 22 feet.  You can work out for yourself (or look it up) the volume of water that would be required to do this.

Boru

As a Muslim I cannot rely on the Bible unless this agrees with the Qur'an because the Bible contains altered verses that later to highlight the exceptional fact. For example, in Genesis it is claimed that Noah's wife was saved from the Flood. However, the Qur'an says the opposite: Noah's wife was drowned by her hypocrisy. In this case, I do not believe what Genesis says about the woman of the Prophet but I rely on what the Quran says. Back to the topic.
The Flood is cited several times in the Qur'an, but there is no clear reference that the entire Earth was covered with water (including all the mountains).
Researchers have found evidence of numerous floods in different sectors of Iraq, some of which indicate intensive destruction. Of course, no one has discovered evidence of a flood capable of covering the entire earth's surface. This evidences what God says in the Quran about the "regional-universal" Flood.

The only worthwhile thing to come out of the Qurannic flood story is ashure.

Boru

[The Grand Nudger]

I think it's time to revive a standing offer I've had on these boards for flood cultists over the years. Point to where you think the flood happened on a map...and I will explain..with hydrological and soil surveys...why it would be completely and inarguably fucking impossible.

That's the fun thing about the deluge...it's not physically possible. Even a regional storm that matches the most paired down version of any in a magic book..would have gone off like a bomb...and we wouldn't be here today debating it. It would have left a crater on the earth...visible from space. Katabatic winds in excess of 600 mph, atmospheric pressure greater than a steam boiler, soil liquefaction........

......it's not something that we could miss or overlook. Nothing even remotely close to the abrahamic deluge has ever happened on earth, or ever could. There is no negotiation with reality over the flood that amounts to a flood...it's just believers calling bullshit on magic book. Well...join the fuckin club?

---

-and then there's the wrinkle of the raft.

Please, flood cultists, describe to me any stitch and glue construction that can survive conditions that would turn a welded steel vessel into a tiny compressed lump of metal.

This is an earnest plea. I work on wooden boats for a hobby...I would very much like to be in possession of a design for a wooden boat that could survive the above.

[arewethereyet]

Aren't these flood people a lot like the flat earth people? Wouldn't all that water just fall off the edges? Or is there a special, secret, invisible godwall holding it?

Jebus H Crisp.

[The Grand Nudger]

"God" would need more than just a magic wall holding back the water. He'd need to have uttered a cantrip that prevented the earth from getting cored like a rock hit by a thermo-nuclear missile.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

Boru

[The Grand Nudger]

The owner of the life-size replica of Noah’s Ark in Northern Kentucky has sued its insurers for refusing to cover, of all things … rain damage.

https://www.kentucky.com/news/state/arti...02744.html