children's bible

[tackattack]

I have a few of them actually. I don't personally like the ones that skip over the "bad" things in the Bible, just as when I teach I teach what the Bible says (both good and bad) about heroes in the Bible like Moses, David, Solomon, Saul, etc. We do have a regular practice as giving the youth a "real bible" when they're about 12. American kids just don't have the attention span (usually) for anything without pictures, especially in this day and age. My son's sits on his bookshelf right in between Moby Dick and his encyclopedias. He'd rather play board games than read though.

[Rev. Rye]

I was reading a thread that talked about someone owning a childrens bible and it reminded me of my own.I remember it had lots of nice stories and kind acts,yet missed the flood,the plauges,and all the other killings.I remember the pretty drawings it had.I also rember believing everything in it because my mom assured me that these things actually happened and was just a smaller version of the bible and that god did many other tings for us with his love.

What followed was me being indoctrinated and going to a catholic school until i turned 15 by wich i had already stoped believing.¿Anyone else have one of these?¿Arent they a good way to get kiids hooked into their beliefs?

I think I had a few Children's Bibles; one had several stories in nursery rhymes, and another one where Jesus looked like Aryan Jesus from Ghastly's Ghastly Comic (except I think that his hair was actually the regular brown). I don't remember those ones taking out the story of the Flood and the Plagues, or even Cain and Abel. I don't even think they minimised the consequences like the Children's Illustrated Bibles in the Reduced Shakespeare Company version of the Bible did. [I wish there was a clip of that scene on YouTube]

Because it was a way to get them to stop fucking the goats.

I really wish that I could let that remark go by without giving a reference to The Island of Death, a film in which the protagonist, a religious fanatic sex maniac of a serial killer actually does fuck a goat in one scene. It's either very horrifying or very hilarious due to its over-the-top-ness. (Note: The review, while not explicit, is still NSFW)

[everythingafter]

What followed was me being indoctrinated and going to a catholic school until i turned 15 by wich i had already stoped believing.¿Anyone else have one of these?¿Arent they a good way to get kiids hooked into their beliefs?

First off. Spell check! Secondly, I have a book of like 200 biblical stories for children. I haven't skimmed through it though. It was a gift from someone for my step daughter I think. I would be willing to bet it doesn't include the monstrosities God inflicted on Job for no reason whatsoever.

[Doubting Thomas]

Jesus said, "I say this to you. If anyone looks at a woman and wants to have sex with her, he has already had sex with her in his mind". (Matthew 5:28)
Psalm 51

But you should always imagine wearing a condom, because when you imagine having sex with someone, you're having sex with everyone they've imagined having sex with.

[reverendjeremiah]

If you ask me, the regular bible is pretty fucking childish.

Min's one liners are pure gold I tell you. Pure GOLD!

---

My son's sits on his bookshelf right in between Moby Dick and his encyclopedias. He'd rather play board games than read though.

Perhaps you should use it as a door stop. You might get your moneys worth out of it then.

[OnlyNatural]

[Gawdzilla]

Jesus said, "I say this to you. If anyone looks at a woman and wants to have sex with her, he has already had sex with her in his mind". (Matthew 5:28)
Psalm 51

But you should always imagine wearing a condom, because when you imagine having sex with someone, you're having sex with everyone they've imagined having sex with.

I'm going to imagine having sex with a hot lesbian right now.