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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion › Christianity v
I am Jesus

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I am Jesus
Wyrd of Gawd Offline
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#181
RE: I am Jesus
May 13, 2016 at 9:52 pm
(May 13, 2016 at 9:20 pm)Nymphadora Wrote:
(May 13, 2016 at 4:13 am)Love333 Wrote: I will not be responding for a few days. I will be in the wilderness meditating. Remember to let love rule. Smile

Will you have a substitute Jesus standing in for you while you're gone?

Zombies!  Zombies everywhere!!
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Love333 Offline
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#182
RE: I am Jesus
May 14, 2016 at 12:01 am
(May 13, 2016 at 5:47 pm)Jörmungandr Wrote: I don't recall Jesus being given to platitudes and incoherent rambling. You are a fake. No "come together" can fix that malfunction.

You think you can see and yet you have no sight.

If I tell you a sunflower needs sunlight and water to grow it is too simple for you to accept, yet If I tell you that same flower is made up of hundreds of tiny flower florets COMING TOGETHER to form one flower then it is too complex for you to accept.

I must get back to the wilderness for now to learn the ways of the father. Peace & love be with all of you.
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Joods Offline Donators
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#183
RE: I am Jesus
May 14, 2016 at 1:39 am
Er.... Jebus lived in the desert. Perhaps that's where you ought to go meditate.

For, like, 40 days or something.
Disclaimer: I am only responsible for what I say, not what you choose to understand. 
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(November 14, 2018 at 8:57 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Have a good day at work.  If we ever meet in a professional setting, let me answer your question now.  Yes, I DO want fries with that.
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Edwardo Piet Away
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#184
RE: I am Jesus
May 14, 2016 at 10:52 am
"I am Jesus."

"No you're not."

/thread
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KUSA Offline
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#185
I am Jesus
May 14, 2016 at 9:53 pm
(May 11, 2016 at 2:03 am)Love333 Wrote: I am Jesus, I have come to save you from your sins.

Will you forgive me of my sins?
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Ravenshire Offline Donators
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#186
RE: I am Jesus
May 14, 2016 at 10:02 pm
(May 14, 2016 at 12:01 am)Love333 Wrote:
(May 13, 2016 at 5:47 pm)Jörmungandr Wrote: I don't recall Jesus being given to platitudes and incoherent rambling.  You are a fake.  No "come together" can fix that malfunction.

You think you can see and yet you have no sight.

If I tell you a sunflower needs sunlight and water to grow it is too simple for you to accept, yet If I tell you that same flower is made up of hundreds of tiny flower florets COMING TOGETHER to form one flower then it is too complex for you to accept.

I must get back to the wilderness for now to learn the ways of the father. Peace & love be with all of you.

Are you ready to allow the Father of Necessary Pretexts into your soulless existence yet?!?
Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#187
RE: I am Jesus
May 15, 2016 at 3:48 pm
Okay, Jesus.

I have surgery on Friday.

Will it be successful and what are the details of that surgery?

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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Edwardo Piet Away
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#188
RE: I am Jesus
May 15, 2016 at 4:11 pm
Don't fall for it when he tells you to get down on your knees first.
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#189
RE: I am Jesus
May 15, 2016 at 4:14 pm
(May 15, 2016 at 4:11 pm)Alasdair Ham Wrote: Don't fall for it when he tells you to get down on your knees first.

That should be a given for any man or woman who encounters a religious person, especially a religious leader, priest, or pastor...

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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Jackalope Away
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#190
RE: I am Jesus
May 15, 2016 at 4:21 pm
Quote:I will not be responding for a few days. I will be in the wilderness masturbating to horse porn.

Fixed that for you.
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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion › Christianity v
I am Jesus

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